So I try to blog as often as possible, but try only to blog when I know that God has really put a vision in my mind of what I need to speak about. Lately, that has been many things. I have been waiting for the ideas to "hatch" so to speak, into something more solid and beautiful, but as time slips away I am forgetting some of the things I have been mentally making a note of to blog. So, here are all of the recent inner workings of my chaotic brain, in which I am referring to tonight as "Crazy-town'.
The first thing I felt nudged by the Holy Spirit to talk about is Christmas (odd, I know). You know how during Christmas there are a few moments where the entire world feels....magical? The stars twinkle brighter, the crisp air refreshes your spirit, you feel giddy inside, you witness so many people helping those less fortunate, you love harder and laugh louder, in the silence you hear music-like wind chimes! and everything just seems....ENCHANTED!!! Well I felt it, the other day in my car, I felt....CHRISTMAS! I felt it inside of me and outside of me too despite the 106 degree heat index. And I was giddy and twinkly and all of those other wonderful Christmas emotions-and in that moment, I remembered how much I love Jesus so much and what He has done for me in my life! Had he physically been near me I would have given Him the world's biggest hug and just cuddled with him for the rest of the day! Something about that feeling enticed me to draw near to Him! And it was a wonderful feeling! Of course my brain thought, why can't everyday be Christmas?? We ask that as children, because of course we want toys everyday! But what about as adults? Are we doing the things in our life and in our relationship with God that make us feel Christmas? Or is our relationship with Him and the business of life causing us to forget that twinkling, silent, magical need to draw near to God and love on and be loved on by our beautiful Savior? For the rest of the day I listened to Christmas music, and prayed more it seemed like, even read more in my Bible then normal before bed that night. It's a feeling I want to happen everyday-and I think it CAN be Christmas everyday, if we are doing the things that keep us CLOSE to Him. Because remember, He doesn't leave. We are the ones who stray. And when we stray....it must be awfully hard to get back to Christmas.
Another thing on my mind came to me watching the movie Hancock today while dozing off into a deep and wonderfully needed NAP! If you have never seen the movie Hancock, it is about this Superhero (Will Smith) who is basically just a delinquent. Yea, he will save you from a burning building, but in the process he will destroy all of the things around the building and cause an even bigger mess--all out of lazyness, loneliness, and his persona of just not giving a darn what people think about him. He ends up saving this one guy, Jason Bateman, who decides to do some PR work for Hancock so the city will see how much they need him and that he really can change from his self-destructive ways. He convinces Hancock to turn himself in (be it that he had hundreds of missed court dates for theft and destruction of property and all kinds of charges against him) and he ends up in jail. During a visit to jail, while Hancock is on the brink of destroying the place and trying to leave, Bateman's character convinces him that all of these behavioral problems of his, and the fascade of not caring is really his way of masking deeper emotions going on beneath the surface. And in the midst of a superhero who was seconds away from punching him in the face he says this "You are called to do this! You are so angry all the time because you are constantly fighting what you were created to do in this life! You are meant to be a superhero!"
It reminds me, how so often we compare ourselves to other people. "Oh she is a much better singer than I am", "How can I ever be that patient of a parent?","She is a super-Christian, when will God use me in that way?", "Why hasn't God asked me to travel the world for Him?" "They have a double-doctor family-I wish I had that kind of money.", "Her husband is so wonderful, why can't I find someone for me?" and the list goes on and on and on and on and on. I know that there are things I was called to do. One is being a wife and mother. I know that one for a fact. I am not sure of other things I am "called" to do persay. I know that there are things I am gifted in and things I am annointed in that I try and live out everyday. But sometimes it is still hard. I see people who have been Christians forever, who travel all over the world to do these outrageous missions for God, and I get sad and jealous-wondering why I am not there. Well, a hard hitting fact guys is that we are all called to do different things, be different places, have different talents, etc etc etc. And that is because, we are one BODY of Christ, and if we were all the same-with the same talents and lacking in the same areas, then there would never be in growth among us. I know for a FACT that I was NEVER meant to do ANYTHING in my life that regards fixing, working on, programming, etc COMPUTERS....I am technology-dumb. I can' work a smart phone, I can barely work a calculator, and I am HORRIBLE on computurs past the point of facebook, blogging, and Word Document. However, I live with a computer programmer (which definitely comes in handy) and it works out because he helps me learn and grow technology wise, and if we were both like theatrically gifted then neither one of us would know how to do anything at home on a computer and probably our jobs and relationships and many other things that revolve around technology these days would suffer. Make sense? I have always considered myself a very well-rounded individual who is passionate about many different things and talented in many different areas as well....but do I think all of those things are my "calling"? No, I don't. And more and more I am becoming ok with that, because when I am taking steps on the path that has already been layed out for me and is in direct alignment with God's will then I see the amazing affects it not only has on me, but those around me as well!
**I told you this blog was random. Christmas, then Hancock. Now what? Oh let's talk about Matt Chandler briefly. I have a few of his sermons, one which is about the roles of husbands and wives. I have listened to it several several times, and will require whoever I date next (if there EVER is another guy I date haha) to listen to it too. Because he lays out SO clearly the roles of husbands and wives and SO bluntly (and sometimes aggressively) addresses the problems that arise today in marriage and what causes it. This guy is ANNOINTED I tell you and hearing him speak everyday driving home from work in my car has been a BLESSING on my life!
I know there was so much more but I can't think of it now. If and when more things come to me, I will certainly add a part two to CrazyTown. Have a blessed day,
In Him,
Meg
