Soul Surfer

Tonight, for the very first time, I watched the movie Soul Surfer--and man was it wonderful. Bethany Hamilton is such a living testament to God's love for us and how that love reveals itself when we align ourselves with His will and walk in complete surrender to His plan for our lives!

The past couple of days I have been pondering what I thought was a big decision. It involved my job and is a move I have been talking about all summer. I have thought about it and stated it in conversation with other people as if it were already a done deal. I went to an interview, where I was offered the job only...something was different. I felt...intimidated, scared, oppressed even. There was thick, heavy, and negative energy in the room and I couldn't get out of there quick enough. Was this typical "interview nerves"? Maybe. But if you know me at all you know that nothing happens in my life that I don't extremely overanalyze, wondering if it is a very vivid sign from God I am supposed to be listening to.

So after I left the interview I called upon several of my prayer warriors, to lift up to God what I should do about the situation. The job would be a HUGE commitment and chunk of my time, and because it is related to my current job I couldn't start and then back out, because then my other job would be affected. I was questionning myself-am I passionate about this enough to commit to it fully? Is this a situation that God wants me to be in? Is sacrificing other things in my life (photography, free time, dance class, other things I love) worth it to do this particular job? I was left very confused and sad that I was so confused, because the last thing I want to do is let anybody down.

The most unsettling times for me in my life are the "in between" moments. The times I have just finished a big show and am looking forward to the next one but in between not acting at all. The times I have been offered an awesome opportunity but it requires a specific time of waiting before it happens. Times between gigs, times between spiritual retreats and ministry opportunities. And most definitely times between missions. Those moments where you know something is on the horizon--no, you have NO idea what that might be, but you KNOW something is there and that God is working in a BIG way on something. Something you can't see, something you don't know, and something you don't want to screw up in the meantime by making wrong decisions. (Yes, I think WAY too much sometimes haha).

I have prayed for patience in every prayer of mine for the past year, because of being in one of those times of waiting. And it always seems that everytime I get a little busy or start working on a project and I stop thinking/worrying about it, is when God shows up the biggest in my life with a very vivid "Next Step" to the ultimate Plan. Does that make sense? No, the puzzle isn't solved and there is no grande resolution I have come to. But with each step forward I become more at peace with knowing I am on the right track and am getting there.

So during this time of waiting the past couple of days, while people were praying like crazy for me, I stumbled upon this movie--Soul Surfer. And God spoke to me through the movie and it is something He made very clear I was to share with you guys. There is a part in the movie, after Bethany has lost her arm and she is in a huge competition with some very tough competitors, that her dad pulls her aside to give her some advice. He tells her that if you fight to race the other girls to every wave it is just going to wear her out and kill her energy. So he tells her "YOU know those moments between sets when it's quiet, and the waves haven't even formed yet, it's just energy surging through the water? That's the time to be PATIENT...LISTEN...and TRUST. You'll know."

Wow! What powerful words that spoke directly to my heart and where I am at in my life right now. During the in between times, the lulls, the transitioning of seasons---there is a very distinct energy I feel. It feels like every molecule in my body moves a little bit quicker in anticipation of the next move of the One who created them. They (the molecules) always feel it before I do. And sometimes it takes me a few days to recognize the feeling and come to the understanding that something is about to happen. When Tim Hamilton told his daughter that about the waves, I could completely relate. But what's even more important than relating to it, is what happens in the second part of his advice. He didn't tell her to feel the energy and go for it. He said that is the time to be patient, to listen ,and to trust. And then you will know.

Many times in our lives we have to wait on God for something or another, for me it is always clarity about a life-decision which comes from anxiety of not knowing the bigger plan. Even during bad times, sometimes we have to sit in it and wait on Him to rescue us. We might feel that energy surging through us, knowing something is about to happen, but it doesn't necessarily mean ACT NOW. More often the not it means, "Wait on Me, My beloved. For I know the plans I have for you and they are plans of good and not of evil. Plans to give you a hope and a future. So rest assured that when you put your hope and faith in me, all will be revealed in My perfect timing." (of course I am paraphrasing here but at various moments in scripture God says ALL of this to us!)

What's even better about God speaking to me through this moment, is what happened while I was watching the movie. I got a call from someone who works with an organization I am very passionate about in Africa which rescues trafficked and enslaved children and offers them a better life. She asked me if I would be interested in going to Africa to tutor some of these kids. I couldn't believe that this was happening after the couple of days I have had pondering what to do in my life. It was horribly perfect timing, horrible because of the gabillion commitments I have this fall, and perfect because I know it was of God--and His perfect timing and will for my life will win above all earthly obligations I have.

So what now, I ask? I am in that moment where I feel I'm sitting on a surfboard in the middle of the ocean, feeling the molecules in the water speed up because of the energy of a huge wave that's on the horizon. A wave I can't even see yet, but that I have to trust I KNOW is there. And I wait. I pray...ALOT! And, I wait for God to send me that burning bush and say "this is it." I feel like when I am suppsed to see the wave, when I am supposed to know the next step in the plan, I will just....KNOW!

If you feel the energy in your life right now, like there is a 'next move' on the horizon you just don't know what it is--then know for one, you are not alone. Not just because I am feeling it too but because God NEVER leaves us sitting on a surfboard in the middle of the ocean. And two, I encourage you to trust God...and wait, for His perfect timing. Easier said than done, trust me I know. But maybe if we are all doing it together we can support one another in another step and another way of bringing the kingdom of Heaven on earth as brothers and sisters in Christ.

In Him,
Meg