Dancing through Brokenness

"I'm broken right now, but I still dance"--Kid President

Many months ago, the Lord spoke directly to my little spirit that my next season would be one of intense healing.
"Healing from what?" I asked.
"You'll see" He said.

Over the next several weeks, life for me changed in big ways. When the Lord promised healing, I knew that my next season would not be one of skipping through a field of wildflowers, holding Jesus' hand and singing "la, la, la, la, lalala." Nope. I knew it would be hard, and probably not fun at times. But I was promised it would be worth it, and His promises I believe. Little did I know, that this spiritual healing and recognition would come through what seemed to be consistent physical brokenness.

Over the course of 2013 so far, I have not been dealt an amazing hands at the game we call life. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism on New Years Eve Day and only a few days after that was told that the immense pain I had been experiencing for over a year was Fibromyalgia, which paired alongside a thyroid that doesn't work well--was no fun. A week after that I ended up having to have a wisdom tooth removed due to a serious infection that limited mobility in my mouth and caused even more severe pain. With the surgery came more jaw bone then they expected and my recovery was longer and harder than expected. Rebounding from surgery and all over pain, I lost one of my jobs which unfortunately was the one providing 70% or more of my monthly income. A few weeks later, I contracted the oh so heinous stomach bug. A few weeks after that leads us up to now, when last night on the way home from work my car bit the eternal dust and Mariah Camry as we called her, sang her last song forever.

Sometimes, when people go through a season where they can't seem to catch a break--it can take what seems like forever for them to see the lessons God had intended for them through each situation. Thankfully, I was listening, and He revealed to me long before this time in my life that I would be going through a time of healing. Crazily enough, the physical brokenness is providing spiritual healing like you wouldn't believe. Through every trial and every circumstance, the Lord reveals more and more to me. Sin that I struggle with and the root of why. Things in my past that I never knew happened or never realized I needed to be healed from. He is even showing me glimpses of what is in store if I faithfully walk this path with Him now.

Everything happens for a reason they say, but it is true. The diagnosis of the things happening inside my body are not a curse--it is a blessing to finally know what is happening, and how to manage the pain a little better. Sure, there is no cure for FMS but there are ways to manage it. And if I stand in the healing that is always offered by the Lord I am certain I will be cured. The wisdom tooth and jaw removal, although a horrifying experience, has helped rid the pain I have had for years caused by TMJ (which is the rubbing together of excess jaw bone)! Even down to the car situation---I woke up today with more faith then ever that the Lord would provide. I concocted a photography deal and had a goal of raising $1000 (pledged) in the next week or two. I raised $1200 pledged in less than 3 hours AND potentially found a new car with the help and dedication of some of the most amazing angels on earth I get to call friends/family--or shall I say, the LORD did all of that. He is preparing these things for me and I am simply walking through them. I was telling a friend today, I would not wish this mishap on anyone but I most certainly wish for anyone and everyone to have the kind of experiences I have had where essentially I have had nothing and see the Lord provide everything I need in that situation, and more!

Have you ever gone through a haunted house as a kid, maybe with a parent or older sibling. You know you have to go because one its Halloween and it's expected, but also the experience you know you will have because you are promised something upon deciding to go through. As little kids, we hold tightly to our parent's hand, stay real close, hold our head down and close our eyes---every now and then peeking through just to see what we are missing. That is how I feel this season. Just like with the haunted house, we are promised we will get out alive--I know this season won't kill me. So I am clinging tight to my Father's hand, closing my eyes (while still soaking up the healing and learning lessons that He needs me to), and walking close to Him until this Haunted House that is my life this season, is finally over. At the end you are always glad you did it, proud you accomplished that you could do it (with God of course), and then ready to get the heck out of there!

One of the things I have learned this season, is to dance through the brokenness. Below is a video of the story of Kid President. If you haven't heard of this kid, then do yourselves a favor and watch him. His spirit is contagious and you can not watch and remain unchanged.

Story of Kid President

So today, I am on my face praising sweet Jesus for His constant provision. I am rejoicing for His promises being fulfilled, even the hard ones, I know He is forever faithful. And I encourage you to listen to the Lord today and find those things your struggling with in this season and watch God faithfully show you what it's all for. We all have times of brokenness, but as kid president says "I'm broken right now, but I still dance!"

Will you choose to dance with the Lord?
In Him,
Meg