Maybe it is just me, but I do not take well to being yelled at, being called names, having my character attacked, hurtful sarcasm, and most of all, people being hateful just because they have no harness on their thoughts, and no remorse to the things they say and do that crush other people. People like this, most of the time, crush others because they are so insecure and angry with who they already are that they see joy when they make others feel as miserable as they feel.
It's an age old lesson that we are taught from the time we are in grade school. Someone is picking on you on the playground and you go home upset about it, what do your parents say? I don't know about yours but my dad spoke to me like an adult, and told me these people were trying to bring me down to pick themselves back up. (Later on he told me I was allowed to punch anyone I wanted to who was physically harming me, and that if I got in trouble he would ALWAYS back me up! haha Maybe not the best parenting advice, but I never doubted that my daddy was on my side when I was doing what was RIGHT.)
We continue to learn this lesson in Jr High and Sr Highschool, when a mean girl spreads hateful and harmful rumors about you. You go home and cry on your bed for hours, and let the pain fester for weeks before telling your parents how awful it is and that you never want to go to school again. I don't know about you guys, but my dad always told me "to kill them with kindness" and it never actually made THEM hurt as bad as they had hurt me, but it always made me feel better about who I was.
Not that my school days were particularly drama-filled by any means, this is stuff I bet 9 out of 10 girls have dealt with too. It's just how girls are. But what happens when you are no longer a girl, but instead a young woman. A young woman who gets to choose her close circle of friends. A young woman who tries her best to love on everyone she encounters. A young woman who is devout in her faith, and striving every second to show others how much God loves them. Does this young woman have to worry about being crushed by "mean girls" on the playground?
I would like to say no, but I would be lying. Because I find myself struggling with this recently. Why do people we know are hurtful angry people, and whom we know do NOT give us our identity, why do we LET them get the better of us?
Once upon a time, there was a child who was left by her mother and abused by a man. There fighting and violence in her once stable household. There was fear, and emptiness, and heartache. When the young girl's stepmother entered the picture, things only worsened. The stepmother abused the young girl in every way that she knew how. She mentally traumatized the girl and everything the young child once held safe and true. There was nowhere to turn, no way to escape. Until one day....she did. Out on her own things were only slightly better, as people will go to any means necessary to make someone else miserable. The young girl was forever trapped inside of a nightmare.
You never know when this story is the past and present that someone has to deal with. You never know the pain and the torture that people have endured, people you walk alongside every single day. This is why the golden rule is doing unto others what you would have done unto you. I would call the above story a "fairytale" but it's not. It's a tragedy. And it's only a small part of my own tragedy.
Having endured a life like this, and healing from this type of living for so long, I would say that my heart is not only as strong as a thousand giants, but also as frail as a dying flower. I have survived alot (and not just me, so many people have this or worse backgrounds to them) so wonder daily, "Since I am old enough to get myself away from people who treat me like this, to own my own emotions, and to fight for the healing of my heart-do I still have to deal with this horror?"
And the answer is. Yes. Sadly, yes I do. Because there are always going to be mean girls on the playground. And there are always going to be wicked stepmother's. And no matter how good the deeds look on the outside that someone might be doing, people are not stupid and they know the truth. They know through your actions if you are hateful. They know through the ugly words that you use that you are angry. They know through your drama that you have gone through drama yourself. They know through the harsh texts, the useless fights, the knee-jerk reactions, the defensive conversations, the swearing, the dissatisfaction in things that are good, and just your everyday behavior-they KNOW if you are a "MEAN GIRL ON THE PLAYGROUND".
And it is ok. To those of us who are still that broken and upset child on the playground, who try and see and try and do GOOD in this world, we have a Heavenly Father on our side who has sent his angels in the Heavenlies to fight for justice, to fight for our souls, and to fight our battles. And to those of you who can't just be NICE to others, and let God enter your heart FULLY so that you will be transformed to a new person-to those of you, God LOVES you so much...and guess what? He is still fighting for YOU TOO! Just because you feel forgotten doesn't mean you are. But that does not mean too that you can stomp around treating other people so badly. Because then you are not dealing with the Heavenly Father who is fighting for you, you are dealing with the Wrathful God who will JUDGE you for the things you do and say on this earth.
No One says you have to be perfect. I am nowhere near perfection, and I know that. I see my flaws, I see my wounds, and I see my imperfections. But I also see and talk to a God who daily is correcting my flaws, healing my wounds, and making me perfect for Him through His Son.
The moral of this story. JUST BE NICE!
In Him,
Meg
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
YOU are beautiful beyond description....
My morning, was rough to say the least. I woke up in a foul mood when all resources of waking me up failed. Needless to say, I missed church. Since I have been having such a hard time at my church the past few months, I tried to tell myself it might have been a blessing in disguise. Feeling anxiety ridden and upset at people and mad at myself for sleeping through my alarm, and shaking off several bad and weird dreams the previous night had granted me, I decided to fall back asleep. I chanted "surround me Lord, surround me Lord, surround me Lord" over and over again, until I drifted into a beautiful slumber.
I re-awoke around 11, extremely rested and ready to start the day. God was tugging on my heart, needing and wanting time alone with me. I opened up to Proverbs and spent some time in the Word and then some time in prayer afterward. That did not seem to do it, for He was so actively at the forefront of my mind this morning (which is a great thing, don't get me wrong!) So I got ready, and had limited time to travel into Jonesboro, grab a bite to eat, and meet my friend for a play we were seeing. I decided to call my grandfather, who is my best buddy. It had been a while since we last saw each other and I missed his company. He treated me to lunch and great company before I headed off to the play.
The day was absolutely beautiful to say the LEAST, so all day I felt God kissing me on the cheek and giggling at my surprise weather :) The play we saw "The Secret Garden" only intensified the gratitude I felt toward Papa for making today my weather-perfect day. **What started out as rough, was turning around so quickly, and bringing such glory to my Father!
After the play, I decided I needed to take that road trip-to enjoy the weather, to listen to and sing songs of praise to my God, and to visit some family who had been on my heart. I drove a couple of hours away to a town called Cord-Charlotte, and Batesville. First I went to Cord where my father's grave is. I set out a blanket, grabbed my Bible and my camera, and sat and worhipped for over an hour. The weather was so beautiful and the wind was captivating my heart so much, there was no way I could sit there and NOT worship such a wonderful Creator!
After worshipping and praying and really just taking in God's splendor, I decided to go see my step greatgrandmother in Batesville. She has always loved me so much, and I had never before came to visit just her. So, I decided it was time. And on the way from Cord to her house in Batesville (about a 30 minute drive in the middle of nothing but farm land) I passed the most amazing sights! Pastures full of the most beautiful animals I had ever seen! They were unlike any cow or any horse or any goat I had ever seen in my life, they were....God! I know that sounds weird, but every where I looked, I saw His face! The clouds, the weeds, the cracks in the pavement, the tree branches, the bugs-EVERYTHING reflected His love, and I was so happy I was hysterically laughing. It was as if God took off his God-glasses and said "Here my Beloved, see the world as I see it" and placed them on me. All of a sudden everything was better, cleaner, crisper, more detailed, and just shone of God's awesomeness!
It was such an intense, and much-needed encounter with Papa I couldn't help cry and laugh and everything all at once! When I prayed that morning after reading Proverbs, and again at the gravesite after reading more of it, I asked for wisdom. I felt compelled to ask for wisdom. And for Papa to show me His glory, to lend me His eyes so I can see things the way He sees them. See, I have been feeling so negative lately what with things at church, and lacking motivation in school, and unreliable friends who hurt my feelings all weekend. I was down, and I cried out to my God to just bring me some joy through granting me wisdom and His eyes. And He did. BOY DID HE!!!!
I would give anything to see the world the way I saw it today, every single day for the rest of my life. People were beautiful, wind was beautiful, trash was beautiful, and even in its own weird way roadkill was beautiful. There was just something so amazing in SEEING things. Not overlooking, but SEEING them for what they are. There was beauty in the emotion that seeing these things brought to my soul. Whether it was the kiss of the wind which brought happiness, or the death of the animal lying on the side of the road which brought sadness, it was all still CAPTIVATING!!
My God is so good. My GOD is SO FAITHFUL! Gosh He really stinking loves us! And I hope you, whoever you are reading this, realize how much the Creator of the entire universe, absolutely ADORES you :)
In Him,
Meg
I re-awoke around 11, extremely rested and ready to start the day. God was tugging on my heart, needing and wanting time alone with me. I opened up to Proverbs and spent some time in the Word and then some time in prayer afterward. That did not seem to do it, for He was so actively at the forefront of my mind this morning (which is a great thing, don't get me wrong!) So I got ready, and had limited time to travel into Jonesboro, grab a bite to eat, and meet my friend for a play we were seeing. I decided to call my grandfather, who is my best buddy. It had been a while since we last saw each other and I missed his company. He treated me to lunch and great company before I headed off to the play.
The day was absolutely beautiful to say the LEAST, so all day I felt God kissing me on the cheek and giggling at my surprise weather :) The play we saw "The Secret Garden" only intensified the gratitude I felt toward Papa for making today my weather-perfect day. **What started out as rough, was turning around so quickly, and bringing such glory to my Father!
After the play, I decided I needed to take that road trip-to enjoy the weather, to listen to and sing songs of praise to my God, and to visit some family who had been on my heart. I drove a couple of hours away to a town called Cord-Charlotte, and Batesville. First I went to Cord where my father's grave is. I set out a blanket, grabbed my Bible and my camera, and sat and worhipped for over an hour. The weather was so beautiful and the wind was captivating my heart so much, there was no way I could sit there and NOT worship such a wonderful Creator!
After worshipping and praying and really just taking in God's splendor, I decided to go see my step greatgrandmother in Batesville. She has always loved me so much, and I had never before came to visit just her. So, I decided it was time. And on the way from Cord to her house in Batesville (about a 30 minute drive in the middle of nothing but farm land) I passed the most amazing sights! Pastures full of the most beautiful animals I had ever seen! They were unlike any cow or any horse or any goat I had ever seen in my life, they were....God! I know that sounds weird, but every where I looked, I saw His face! The clouds, the weeds, the cracks in the pavement, the tree branches, the bugs-EVERYTHING reflected His love, and I was so happy I was hysterically laughing. It was as if God took off his God-glasses and said "Here my Beloved, see the world as I see it" and placed them on me. All of a sudden everything was better, cleaner, crisper, more detailed, and just shone of God's awesomeness!
It was such an intense, and much-needed encounter with Papa I couldn't help cry and laugh and everything all at once! When I prayed that morning after reading Proverbs, and again at the gravesite after reading more of it, I asked for wisdom. I felt compelled to ask for wisdom. And for Papa to show me His glory, to lend me His eyes so I can see things the way He sees them. See, I have been feeling so negative lately what with things at church, and lacking motivation in school, and unreliable friends who hurt my feelings all weekend. I was down, and I cried out to my God to just bring me some joy through granting me wisdom and His eyes. And He did. BOY DID HE!!!!
I would give anything to see the world the way I saw it today, every single day for the rest of my life. People were beautiful, wind was beautiful, trash was beautiful, and even in its own weird way roadkill was beautiful. There was just something so amazing in SEEING things. Not overlooking, but SEEING them for what they are. There was beauty in the emotion that seeing these things brought to my soul. Whether it was the kiss of the wind which brought happiness, or the death of the animal lying on the side of the road which brought sadness, it was all still CAPTIVATING!!
My God is so good. My GOD is SO FAITHFUL! Gosh He really stinking loves us! And I hope you, whoever you are reading this, realize how much the Creator of the entire universe, absolutely ADORES you :)
In Him,
Meg
Does Anybody Hear Her?
She is running, a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction.
She is trying, but the canyon's ever widening in the depths of her cold heart.
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find,
She's another two years older and she's three more steps behind.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple,
with all the lost and lonely people,
searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
She is yearning for shelter and affection, that she never found at home.
She is searching for a hero to ride in , to ride in and save the day.
And in walks her prince charming, and he knows just what to say.
Momentary lapse of reason, and she gives her heart away.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does she even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple,
with all the lost and lonely people,
searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
She is trying, but the canyon's ever widening in the depths of her cold heart.
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find,
She's another two years older and she's three more steps behind.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple,
with all the lost and lonely people,
searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
She is yearning for shelter and affection, that she never found at home.
She is searching for a hero to ride in , to ride in and save the day.
And in walks her prince charming, and he knows just what to say.
Momentary lapse of reason, and she gives her heart away.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does she even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple,
with all the lost and lonely people,
searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me.
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Y.O.Y.O!
My best girlfriends and I used to have a favorite catch phrase "YOYO!" which means, You're Only Young Once. When one of us didn't feel like going out one night, we were sure to get a "yoyo" texted our direction. When there was an adventure awaiting us we shouted "yoyo" and would conquer the world, just a bunch of silly girls, our huge dreams, and our strong friendship that protected us from everything.
Now we are all getting older, some of us married, some of us with children, some of us engaged...and the adventures seem to be ceasing. My heart, however, is not settled down and is still longing for adventure.
I moved out of my house when I was 16 years old and have been uprooted from place to place ever since. My home life wasn't stable by any means, so it wasn't like I was leaving a home. I was just leaving, a place. To go to another place, to shortly leave that place and go to another, etc etc. Now, almost 8 years later, I am still living that way. I think my heart has multiple personalities, or well, maybe 2 distinct ones.
The first: Domestication. I want so badly to be a wife, and to be a mother, and to raise a family, and to glorify God through all of that. I want support and a partnership that makes my calling and my ministry stronger. I want someone to come home to, to talk about my day to, to pray with, to cry with, etc. I don't want to face the trials of this world alone anymore, I am sick of being a survivor! I finally want to relax in my own skin and be comfortable finally having stability.
The second: Gypsy. I have been born to handle not only a lifestyle of moving around, but also am most comfortable in my own self when my spirit is able to be completely free. This lifestyle speaks to the part of my soul that wants to hop in an RV and travel the world, playing music, getting random jobs to support myself, and spreading God's love through every life I encounter. This road is lonely because if dating were even an option he would have to want to live that sort of life with me, and those type of guys are hard to find too.
These two parts of my heart are in a CONSTANT state of battle, and it wears down on me a little each day. Because when I am in a season where I want so much to give someone all the love I have, I find my dating life desolate and lonely. That is where I am at right now, I feel pushed more toward the gypsy part of my life just by association of having no one in my life right now to keep me grounded. Which I guess, is ok.
I am also struggling with feeling like I am special. I have dated some (well, jerks but who hasn't haha but also) AMAZING men who truly feel I am such a prize, and so unique, and so special! I even have just guy friends who tell me this, everyday! So, I find it hard when dating or attempting to date, people who just don't see it. I not only know that I am a princess because the Lord tells me that, but I too feel like I am a kick-butt girlfriend, and would make a guy freaking happy by being a kick-butt wife too! So when I date, mediocre guys, who don't have the passion for love that i have, or the will to put any effort into a relationship I am instantly defeated. I am awesome enough to WANT to text and to WANT to call and to WANT to communicate with, I shouldn't have to chase you down!!! And....I won't do it anymore, not for anyone. Because I am worth the fight, I am worth the chase!
This blog is sort of word-vomit of a bunch of crap I have had to deal with this week, and no I know, it is not as cheerful and Jesus-loving as it usually is, but it is the truth. You, readers, or...reader-whoever you are haha, are bearing witness to my heart of hearts right now. I am facing the facts that I am a survivor through life, and my heart will remain open for whoever wants to test it out...because I can't hide who I am. I have SO much love to give! Whether it be to kiddos I teach or my friends or a dog or the future love of my life!!!! But I will NOT settle for having my heart broken by people who are not even worth it! So, if you get booted out of this gypsy's life then you clearly weren't worth the pain it would've caused me in the long-run!
Tomorrow, I am hopping into my car with one of my besties and we are driving until we run out of road-because that is what gypsy's do! If you pass me along the journey, then be cautious...I may bite ;)
In Him,
Meg
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Church Didn't Save Me....GOD DID!
Tonight, I was hit with the very hard and very painful realization that there are people in my family who do not know Jesus, the way I know Jesus. I am not talking about my blood family, I mean...my Christian one. People I go to church with, people I eat lunch with on Sundays, people who open their home to me, people I am around several times a week. My heart shattered. Not only because they do not know the Savior as I know Him, but because I DIDN'T KNOW that they didn't.
I feel the question that lingers in the untouched air of today's Christian society is "Where is the disconnect?" When does it happen that people no longer are hungry for the Word, no longer want to know Jesus, no longer aim to live Biblically accurate lives? Christians have created a way that it is easy to be a "Christian" without ever having to know Jesus at all. Who doesn't want to be a Christian when it is that easy? Guess what? IT IS NOT THAT EASY! Nor, was it ever promised to us that it would be. When you are SAVED, your life should look radically, totally, and DRASTICALLY different then the rest of the world-because you are not living in the world or of the world's standards, but you are called by God to rise above and live your life set apart from that way of life.
I was 22 years old before I met Jesus. Before that, I would have called myself a Christian. My parents took me to church when I was a child. My uncle is a minister and all my family had a great reputation as God-loving, God-fearing people. I went to youth group, sang the songs, did the camp thing, played on inflatable jumping toys. And most importantly, I believed that God existed. Well do you know what? Come to find out that devil worshipers believe in God too! So, what is that saying about our faith when the one thing we fall back on in regards to defending our personal action of faith is nothing different than people who worship satan?
GOD SAVED ME. GOD SAVED ME. GOD SAVED ME. I was in a dark hole of a nightmarish life and GOD SAVED ME. He appeared to me and I heard the story of Jesus out of God's mouth himself. GOD SAVED ME. He thrust His Holy Spirit upon and broke my hard yet bleeding heart. GOD SAVED ME! In one instant, my entire life was DRAMATICALLY changed. Upon accepting Jesus it was if someone snapped their fingers and I was a completely different person. I thought differently, I spoke differently, I acted differently. EVERYTHING was changed, because I was no longer old Meg. I became transformed through God's love for me. Why isn't that everybody's experience with meeting Jesus for the first time?
Maybe you are thinking "Well, I have never gone through trials of anykind where God had to pull me out of something dark?" Ok, but nobody is perfect and God is trying to meet you in the trials you face today, even small things, and asking you to rely on Him and let Him change you but you are not even aware of that much because you are not even aware that you are desperately hungry for Him to begin with. Maybe you are thinking "I grew up in church, my parents are Christians, I don't ever remember not loving the Lord" Well that is AMAZING!! But are you acting like you love the Lord in all that you say? All that you do? Does every breath you breathe Glorify the One who gave you that breath?
There is a disconnect in the church and relationship to God. On any given day God is something different to me. On days where I miss my earthly dad who passed away, He is not only my strength and my comfort but He is my Father! On days I feel adventurous and need to get away, God is my playmate. On days where I feel sad and need to vent, God is my best girlfriend. On days where I am lonely, God romances me and becomes my Lover. He is the only one who knows what we need, and He always gives that to me. And if I don't feel it, I ask to. It is really as simple as that. We take for granted how powerful He is and also the power of Prayer. We take for granted the WORD of God, which is direct communication with how He wants us to live our lives. So many people use the excuse of "well I don't understand what I am reading!" I had the same trouble, but you know what I did that worked? I PRAYED. I prayed for God to lend me His spiritual eyes so that I could understand what I am reading. Instantly, I got it. He wants us to get it, He wants us to know these things so when we don't get it or don't understand then ASK Him to help you. That is what He is there for. Don't discredit the power of the Holy Spirit and how it transforms your life. WE are not powerful! We hold NO power. BUT GOD DOES! And He is going to use us whether we think we are worthy or not. We should not fear going out into the world and spreading His message because it is not us that is spreading it, it is the power of the Almighty God living inside of us.
Church did not save me. Church gave me a family whom I adore. Church gave me a support system that I need. Church gave me an avenue for all of the passions and talent God has given me in order to use them in ministry. But church did not Save me. God saved me.
There is a problem when church expects the unsaved to come to them, instead of going to the unsaved. There is a problem when people in the pews of a congregation question who Jesus is after 30 years of being a Christian. There is a problem when leadership in aims for bigger numbers to fill a multimillion dollar facility full of pews. There is a problem when the sermon becomes a motivational speech and not about Jesus Christ. There is a problem when the Bible is watered down. There is a PROBLEM when the message of Christ is twisted and contorted to make the people in the pews feel comfortable with living a Biblically inaccurate lifestyle. THERE IS A PROBLEM WHEN THERE ARE PEOPLE IN YOUR PEWS WHO ARE CONTINUOUSLY STARVING FOR THE WORD AND DESPERATE TO BE FED!!!
WAKEUP CHURCH! THERE. IS. A. PROBLEM!
In Him,
Meg
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Guys and Dolls
The past week or so, I have been hit hard with the realization that I am single. And not just that I am single (because I have been that way for a long time now) but that unlike other times in my life, there are not even any prospects in the wings. My life consists of online classes, teaching small children, church, and meetings with girlfriends. So far, no men have popped up in my online classes dying to take out the girl who submits papers on child abuse and jevenile delinquency. The children I teach at church seem to have married parents and no older male siblings. At the theater I teach at I only see the children's mothers. And church....you would think this would be a wonderful place to find an amazing, God loving, Christian (SINGLE) man. Not the case in my congregation. So I am left wondering, what are some things to do in this town where I can meet new people. The answer I have been given (by friends and my own logic) are bars downtown. This serves as a problem for me, because unless that guy is in the bar to minster it seems unlikely that he will be the type of guy I am looking for.
So, what kind of guy am I looking for? (First of all, I would not necessarily say I am looking. Actually, I am quite content with him falling into my lap via help from the Lord or someone reading this very blog who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who will be PERFECT for me) This has inspired me to write down what I need in a man. If you see this list, and know this man, please....by all means.... :)
1. First and foremost he must LOVE THE LORD with every fiber of his being. Being a "christian" is simply not going to cut it, because it takes more than warming a pew with your butt on Sunday mornings to really be the kind of guy who will be able to handle and support me in my calling.
2. If he is religiously legalistic then....NEXT. I am a radical Jesus loving follower and require that someone I am with has that same wreckless abandonment for my God that I have.
3. Called to ministry. Which, honestly, I feel like we are all called to ministry-just in different avenues. I need someone who recognizes that calling and regardless of if you are a lawyer or cop or whatever, are living out that calling in your profession.
4. I need someone who longs to travel with me. I refuse to be stuck in Jonesboro Arkansas for the rest of my life, and quite frankly am hesitant on even dating guys here because most of the people here are already stuck!
5. It is absolutely required that I end up with someone more intellectual than myself. I like it when my guy can teach me new things. I need to be challenged because I get bored very easily.
6. His sense of humor must be witty in order to keep up with my bantor and pop culture references. I love to laugh, and I love to make people laugh. So being with someone I can do that for and does that for me is a plus.
7. One of the most important things for me is being able to be myself. I am the kind of girl who takes her shoes off and dances in the middle of WalMart and I need a guy who stands back and smiles and thinks to himself "Man I love her" OR better yet, a guy who joins in and dances with me because when we are together nothing else in the world matters. If you make me feel weird or try to restrict my free spirit in anyway then you will never make it in the world of Meg so there is no sense in trying.
8. I need someone who is compassionate. I have the world's most tender heart and if I am seeking compassion or empathy from a guy and he tries to "toughen me up" oh heck to the no, see ya :) My heart breaks for the things of this world that breaks God's heart. I am called to the frontlines of working with the broken hearted, the abandoned, the children of the world who feel unloved and unwanted, and at the end of every day I am sure that all I could really use is a hug and the option to cry it all out on your shoulder if I need to.
9. I want to matter to someone. I want to be so important to somebody that my opinions matter, what I am doing throughout my day matters, and seeing me matters. If a guy does not attempt to see me as much as he can, or communicate with me on a constant basis then it will not work. See, because I know that I am a princess and I know that I deserve the best. My God has told me that and I will not settle for a guy who makes me feel anyless than what I deserve. And maybe I wont find that guy, but I will be single forever before I settle.
10. I am at the point in my life where I am done casually dating. I am "looking" for my husband. So I need a guy who is also at that same point in his life, because I will not wait 5 years to marry you when I am ready now. That's just the way it is. I want marriage and kids and I need a guy who also wants those things.
So see, for the most part it would seem pretty simple. But no, it has not been. So what is my plan of action? Continuing doing the Lord's work, knowing that in His perfect timing He will work all of it out for me. Also, travelling more and meeting men outside of this large small town. And lastly, leaving it up to the amazing Christian men and women in my life to recommend guys to me!
My friends and family think I am picky. But I refuse to get married for the sake of getting married. 30-40year olds today who struggle in their marriage realize that their reasons for getting married in the first place were wrong and they are paying the price for it. Marriage is tough no doubt about it, but it is also beautiful. And it was created to bring GLORY to our LORD and I want that for my life. So yes, I will continue to be picky so that my marriage will do everything the God created marriage to do.
In Him,
Meg
So, what kind of guy am I looking for? (First of all, I would not necessarily say I am looking. Actually, I am quite content with him falling into my lap via help from the Lord or someone reading this very blog who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who will be PERFECT for me) This has inspired me to write down what I need in a man. If you see this list, and know this man, please....by all means.... :)
1. First and foremost he must LOVE THE LORD with every fiber of his being. Being a "christian" is simply not going to cut it, because it takes more than warming a pew with your butt on Sunday mornings to really be the kind of guy who will be able to handle and support me in my calling.
2. If he is religiously legalistic then....NEXT. I am a radical Jesus loving follower and require that someone I am with has that same wreckless abandonment for my God that I have.
3. Called to ministry. Which, honestly, I feel like we are all called to ministry-just in different avenues. I need someone who recognizes that calling and regardless of if you are a lawyer or cop or whatever, are living out that calling in your profession.
4. I need someone who longs to travel with me. I refuse to be stuck in Jonesboro Arkansas for the rest of my life, and quite frankly am hesitant on even dating guys here because most of the people here are already stuck!
5. It is absolutely required that I end up with someone more intellectual than myself. I like it when my guy can teach me new things. I need to be challenged because I get bored very easily.
6. His sense of humor must be witty in order to keep up with my bantor and pop culture references. I love to laugh, and I love to make people laugh. So being with someone I can do that for and does that for me is a plus.
7. One of the most important things for me is being able to be myself. I am the kind of girl who takes her shoes off and dances in the middle of WalMart and I need a guy who stands back and smiles and thinks to himself "Man I love her" OR better yet, a guy who joins in and dances with me because when we are together nothing else in the world matters. If you make me feel weird or try to restrict my free spirit in anyway then you will never make it in the world of Meg so there is no sense in trying.
8. I need someone who is compassionate. I have the world's most tender heart and if I am seeking compassion or empathy from a guy and he tries to "toughen me up" oh heck to the no, see ya :) My heart breaks for the things of this world that breaks God's heart. I am called to the frontlines of working with the broken hearted, the abandoned, the children of the world who feel unloved and unwanted, and at the end of every day I am sure that all I could really use is a hug and the option to cry it all out on your shoulder if I need to.
9. I want to matter to someone. I want to be so important to somebody that my opinions matter, what I am doing throughout my day matters, and seeing me matters. If a guy does not attempt to see me as much as he can, or communicate with me on a constant basis then it will not work. See, because I know that I am a princess and I know that I deserve the best. My God has told me that and I will not settle for a guy who makes me feel anyless than what I deserve. And maybe I wont find that guy, but I will be single forever before I settle.
10. I am at the point in my life where I am done casually dating. I am "looking" for my husband. So I need a guy who is also at that same point in his life, because I will not wait 5 years to marry you when I am ready now. That's just the way it is. I want marriage and kids and I need a guy who also wants those things.
So see, for the most part it would seem pretty simple. But no, it has not been. So what is my plan of action? Continuing doing the Lord's work, knowing that in His perfect timing He will work all of it out for me. Also, travelling more and meeting men outside of this large small town. And lastly, leaving it up to the amazing Christian men and women in my life to recommend guys to me!
My friends and family think I am picky. But I refuse to get married for the sake of getting married. 30-40year olds today who struggle in their marriage realize that their reasons for getting married in the first place were wrong and they are paying the price for it. Marriage is tough no doubt about it, but it is also beautiful. And it was created to bring GLORY to our LORD and I want that for my life. So yes, I will continue to be picky so that my marriage will do everything the God created marriage to do.
In Him,
Meg
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Once Upon A Time...
Once upon a time, in a not so far away land, lived a young girl. This girl was more beautiful than she would ever know, for the evils of the world had done everything to ensure that she would never find out her true identity. You see, this was no ordinary girl. No. She was the daughter of a king. A PRINCESS.
However, her journey in life resembled nothing of royalty. This "princess" was born to ordinary parents whom both, she lost. She was an orphan drowning in a sea of abandonment, and accustomed to fighting her way through life in order to survive. She went to any means necessary to show her strength, because she knew if she were weak the world would swallow her alive.
Walking through life scared, alone, angry, and broken-the most amazing thing happened. She met a Prince. This Prince took one look at the raggedy orphan and wept, for he knew of the pain she had gone through. With his hand to her chin he lifted her sight to meet his awaiting eyes.
"You, My Beloved" he whispered "have CAPTIVATED me."
The Prince and the young girl spent everyday together. They walked hand in hand through their mornings. They shared meals together. She shared with him the inner most desires of her quickly healing heart. She cried on his shoulder. She laughed until her heart ached. For the first time in her whole life, she felt safe. She was home.
The prince loved the young girl so much that he could not wait to introduce her to his Father. When the girl caught a glimpse of the glory of the King she fell to the ground, unable to move. Paralyzed by shame and the guilt of her former life, she dared not face such a powerful king.
"My Daughter" he said, lifting her off of the ground. "I love you more than you will ever know. And not because of what you have done, but because of who you are. My son thinks highly of you. You are my Daughter whom I adore."
Looking back at her Prince, the new Princess wept in joy! Shedding the rags of her old clothing, the King wrapped around the Princess the most beautiful cloak one had ever seen. He placed a ring on her finger that sparkled greater than any star in the sky. He placed a crown on her head that reflected every color in the rainbow plus colors she had never even seen before. The King kissed the Princess on her cheek and placed her hand back into the hands of her Prince.
The little princess walked with her Prince into a beautiful garden. He sat her down and said to her:
"There are people in the world, like you once were, unaware how much my Father loves them. In His name, will you tell them how much they are wanted? Will you share your life with them so that my Father can do His work through you?"
"Of course, my Prince. I will do anything you ask."
He placed his hand on her heart.
"I will live in here forever my Beloved. You will never know another lonely night. You will never feel like you are unwanted or unloved, ever again. If you start to doubt it, cry out to me my princess. I will immediately surround you with peace and comfort. I will kiss you every morning when you awake and wrap my arms around you every night as you fall asleep. I am sending a counselor to help you, for I know how indecisive you are my precious girl. I know you will need help figuring out what to do, and I want nothing more than to help you. I long to hear you cry out to me. Never forget that the power of my father is how you will accomplish your mission. Love Him, because he loves you so. And love others, so that they may know Him too. Do you think you can do this little princess?"
The princess thought about it for a moment. Though it would be hard, leaving her safe home with her Prince and re-entering the world that was so cruel to innocent heart, she knew what she had to do. The other princesses of the world must know about their Prince and how much their Father, the King, adores them. So she would tell them.
"Yes, my Prince. I will be a vessel to bring light to dark places. When I am sad, when I am scared, when I feel like I am the only one fighting for justice, when I don't feel I have a voice, when I am tempted, when I am persecuted, or when I am in danger, I will remember that you are in my heart, and the power of the King lies in my faith that He can do the impossible."
The Prince kissed the little princess goodbye.
"Until we meet again, my Beloved."
"Yes" she smiled. "Until we meet again, my Prince."
In Him,
Meg
However, her journey in life resembled nothing of royalty. This "princess" was born to ordinary parents whom both, she lost. She was an orphan drowning in a sea of abandonment, and accustomed to fighting her way through life in order to survive. She went to any means necessary to show her strength, because she knew if she were weak the world would swallow her alive.
Walking through life scared, alone, angry, and broken-the most amazing thing happened. She met a Prince. This Prince took one look at the raggedy orphan and wept, for he knew of the pain she had gone through. With his hand to her chin he lifted her sight to meet his awaiting eyes.
"You, My Beloved" he whispered "have CAPTIVATED me."
The Prince and the young girl spent everyday together. They walked hand in hand through their mornings. They shared meals together. She shared with him the inner most desires of her quickly healing heart. She cried on his shoulder. She laughed until her heart ached. For the first time in her whole life, she felt safe. She was home.
The prince loved the young girl so much that he could not wait to introduce her to his Father. When the girl caught a glimpse of the glory of the King she fell to the ground, unable to move. Paralyzed by shame and the guilt of her former life, she dared not face such a powerful king.
"My Daughter" he said, lifting her off of the ground. "I love you more than you will ever know. And not because of what you have done, but because of who you are. My son thinks highly of you. You are my Daughter whom I adore."
Looking back at her Prince, the new Princess wept in joy! Shedding the rags of her old clothing, the King wrapped around the Princess the most beautiful cloak one had ever seen. He placed a ring on her finger that sparkled greater than any star in the sky. He placed a crown on her head that reflected every color in the rainbow plus colors she had never even seen before. The King kissed the Princess on her cheek and placed her hand back into the hands of her Prince.
The little princess walked with her Prince into a beautiful garden. He sat her down and said to her:
"There are people in the world, like you once were, unaware how much my Father loves them. In His name, will you tell them how much they are wanted? Will you share your life with them so that my Father can do His work through you?"
"Of course, my Prince. I will do anything you ask."
He placed his hand on her heart.
"I will live in here forever my Beloved. You will never know another lonely night. You will never feel like you are unwanted or unloved, ever again. If you start to doubt it, cry out to me my princess. I will immediately surround you with peace and comfort. I will kiss you every morning when you awake and wrap my arms around you every night as you fall asleep. I am sending a counselor to help you, for I know how indecisive you are my precious girl. I know you will need help figuring out what to do, and I want nothing more than to help you. I long to hear you cry out to me. Never forget that the power of my father is how you will accomplish your mission. Love Him, because he loves you so. And love others, so that they may know Him too. Do you think you can do this little princess?"
The princess thought about it for a moment. Though it would be hard, leaving her safe home with her Prince and re-entering the world that was so cruel to innocent heart, she knew what she had to do. The other princesses of the world must know about their Prince and how much their Father, the King, adores them. So she would tell them.
"Yes, my Prince. I will be a vessel to bring light to dark places. When I am sad, when I am scared, when I feel like I am the only one fighting for justice, when I don't feel I have a voice, when I am tempted, when I am persecuted, or when I am in danger, I will remember that you are in my heart, and the power of the King lies in my faith that He can do the impossible."
The Prince kissed the little princess goodbye.
"Until we meet again, my Beloved."
"Yes" she smiled. "Until we meet again, my Prince."
In Him,
Meg
Friday, January 21, 2011
Fasting from Facebook
Yesterday, a really good friend of mine hurt my feelings very much. This morning, when I opened my eyes, I instantly remembered the hurt and began tossing his hateful words around in my head. I was obsessed. I wondered how someone could be so kind and loving one second, and the next, act like you are the devil himself. I did not understand it and the more I thought about it, the angrier I became.
After reeling from the situation with this friend (pre-eyes-even-opening-to-greet-the-day), I had a few text messages from another friend asking about homework. Normally, this wouldn't bother me at all but I was already in a bad mood from examining the situation with this other friend. I was not upset at all that she asked about homework, but that I was still in bed carelessly giving little (well, no) thought to it at all. The messages stressed me out because they caused me to think about something I was actively trying not to think about at all.
So, before my feet even hit the floor I was 1.upset, and 2.stressed out. Half-awake, half-zombie I got out of bed, made my way to the computer, and when my eyes opened I miraculously found that my sleep-self had made it on to facebook. It was at that moment that I truly thought to myself "I'm barely awake, haven't talked to God, and somehow I am already glued to the facebook world"-checking on statuses I missed while sleeping, checking my inbox, and wondering what next clever thing I could post on my own profile. This. Is. Sad.
So, I got off of facebook and went downstairs, where I preceded to get onto a different computer and attempt the online homework the friend had warned me about that morning. It was hard. And everything she said about it was right (dang) so I was even more frustrated because I also couldn't figure out which assignment was due.
During those moments, I got a text from a dear friend of mine who I am getting to worship with tomorrow night. It was just small chit-chat, but she mentioned something huge that made my heart smile. She was fasting from facebook. She confessed to having so many distractions in and of the world that get in the way sometimes of her relationship with God and full commitment to Him. Immediately I said "I'm in!" I recognized that part of my problem throughout that whole upset, stressful, and confusing morning was that I was letting things of the world distract me from centering on my God.
You see, God has opened some pretty huge and pretty amazing doors for me over the past few weeks. And with that responsibility, usually comes some pretty intense spiritual warfare. As Beth Moore states (paraphrasing)
Anything God does, satan is going to try and counter. We are assigned specific holy angels from the Lord as well as specific un-holy angels from satan to attempt to counter what God and His angels are doing in and for us. We are constantly surrounded by spiritual warfare.
I knew satan would have it out for me hard, to try and get my "human nature" to mess up and undo all of the works God is doing in my life. I just, never knew how the attacks would come. After talking with my friend about the facebook fast, deciding to do it, and meditating on distractions of this world I knew instantly that satan so often 'gets us' with the LITTLE things. Things we would not normally think about, like spending too much time on facebook.
If you are reading this right now, I encourage you to take a minute and think about some little things that really, when added up, become big distractions from your relationship with God. We forget that we need not worry about anything. And we easily forget that we are not in control. And, that if we truly focused on nothing but a relationship with God, then HE will take care of the rest!
God loves us. He wants to dance with us everyday. Kiss our cheeks and hold our hands. He wants to romance us with sunsets and roses and butterflies. He wants to whisper into our ears how much He adores us. He is in love with us, and wants nothing more in return than for us to fall head over heels in love with Him too. And out of that love, he takes care of us!
What are some things you worry about or attempt to have control over that God wants to take off of your hands? finances? worry about children? job? What are some little things you need to delete from your life (or like me, at least take a break from)? facebook? dating? shopping? video games? When we relinquish control to God, He will not let us down. He is creating something beautiful IN us and FOR us, and all He asks of us is to trust Him.
Even if this guy does not know how badly he hurt my feelings, I want to forgive him anyway, and give that situation up to God. I will pray for this man's heart, that he truly changes from his tempermental ways. I will pray that the Lord show him how acting that way, and letting satan win, will destroy the plans the Lord has for him (ministry wise or other). To the friend who stressed me out, I deeply apologize. She had no idea that her texts were walking in on my already bad morning. Nor did she know I was choosing to procrastinate the homework. Her willingness to knock it out inspired me to do it so I thank her very much for that. And to my fellow facebook faster-I love you so much. You are a BEAUTIFUL woman of God and inspire me so much, even when you have no idea you are doing it. This is the start of a beautiful, non-judgemental, honest and loving, AWESOME friendship!
In Him.
Meg
P.S. If you are reading this ON facebook, I am not on it haha. There is a share application!
After reeling from the situation with this friend (pre-eyes-even-opening-to-greet-the-day), I had a few text messages from another friend asking about homework. Normally, this wouldn't bother me at all but I was already in a bad mood from examining the situation with this other friend. I was not upset at all that she asked about homework, but that I was still in bed carelessly giving little (well, no) thought to it at all. The messages stressed me out because they caused me to think about something I was actively trying not to think about at all.
So, before my feet even hit the floor I was 1.upset, and 2.stressed out. Half-awake, half-zombie I got out of bed, made my way to the computer, and when my eyes opened I miraculously found that my sleep-self had made it on to facebook. It was at that moment that I truly thought to myself "I'm barely awake, haven't talked to God, and somehow I am already glued to the facebook world"-checking on statuses I missed while sleeping, checking my inbox, and wondering what next clever thing I could post on my own profile. This. Is. Sad.
So, I got off of facebook and went downstairs, where I preceded to get onto a different computer and attempt the online homework the friend had warned me about that morning. It was hard. And everything she said about it was right (dang) so I was even more frustrated because I also couldn't figure out which assignment was due.
During those moments, I got a text from a dear friend of mine who I am getting to worship with tomorrow night. It was just small chit-chat, but she mentioned something huge that made my heart smile. She was fasting from facebook. She confessed to having so many distractions in and of the world that get in the way sometimes of her relationship with God and full commitment to Him. Immediately I said "I'm in!" I recognized that part of my problem throughout that whole upset, stressful, and confusing morning was that I was letting things of the world distract me from centering on my God.
You see, God has opened some pretty huge and pretty amazing doors for me over the past few weeks. And with that responsibility, usually comes some pretty intense spiritual warfare. As Beth Moore states (paraphrasing)
Anything God does, satan is going to try and counter. We are assigned specific holy angels from the Lord as well as specific un-holy angels from satan to attempt to counter what God and His angels are doing in and for us. We are constantly surrounded by spiritual warfare.
I knew satan would have it out for me hard, to try and get my "human nature" to mess up and undo all of the works God is doing in my life. I just, never knew how the attacks would come. After talking with my friend about the facebook fast, deciding to do it, and meditating on distractions of this world I knew instantly that satan so often 'gets us' with the LITTLE things. Things we would not normally think about, like spending too much time on facebook.
If you are reading this right now, I encourage you to take a minute and think about some little things that really, when added up, become big distractions from your relationship with God. We forget that we need not worry about anything. And we easily forget that we are not in control. And, that if we truly focused on nothing but a relationship with God, then HE will take care of the rest!
God loves us. He wants to dance with us everyday. Kiss our cheeks and hold our hands. He wants to romance us with sunsets and roses and butterflies. He wants to whisper into our ears how much He adores us. He is in love with us, and wants nothing more in return than for us to fall head over heels in love with Him too. And out of that love, he takes care of us!
What are some things you worry about or attempt to have control over that God wants to take off of your hands? finances? worry about children? job? What are some little things you need to delete from your life (or like me, at least take a break from)? facebook? dating? shopping? video games? When we relinquish control to God, He will not let us down. He is creating something beautiful IN us and FOR us, and all He asks of us is to trust Him.
Even if this guy does not know how badly he hurt my feelings, I want to forgive him anyway, and give that situation up to God. I will pray for this man's heart, that he truly changes from his tempermental ways. I will pray that the Lord show him how acting that way, and letting satan win, will destroy the plans the Lord has for him (ministry wise or other). To the friend who stressed me out, I deeply apologize. She had no idea that her texts were walking in on my already bad morning. Nor did she know I was choosing to procrastinate the homework. Her willingness to knock it out inspired me to do it so I thank her very much for that. And to my fellow facebook faster-I love you so much. You are a BEAUTIFUL woman of God and inspire me so much, even when you have no idea you are doing it. This is the start of a beautiful, non-judgemental, honest and loving, AWESOME friendship!
In Him.
Meg
P.S. If you are reading this ON facebook, I am not on it haha. There is a share application!
Sunday, January 16, 2011
What I Did in Church Today
I have said this many times before throughout my blogs, but I am going to say it again as sort of a recapping the blessing it is in my life sort of deal. I feel so very fortunate to have found my faith later in life. There was no mold to break, because I did not grow up in church. There were no beliefs of my parents to question, because I did not have parents who expressed a belief system to me really at all. I have no one to please, because I get that the bigger picture is my personal and extremely intimate relationship with God and spreading His love to those who do not know of it. I am a free agent.
However, as part of this following Christ deal, I am now a part of a FAMILY. Family who seeks to help each other out, walking this difficult road in life and holding each other accountable for believing what we believe. So when I feel I see something happening, that lends no strengths to the collective body of Christ as a whole, I tend to want to say something.
Versus ranting and raving about church, versus throwing hissy fits trying to get things to change, and versus being completely silent hoping we progress as the body of Christ (and then leaving the church altogether when we don't)...I am going to, SPEAK.
In church this morning, I tried VERY hard to pay attention, which normally is not difficult for me at all because I adore our preacher and he always has extremely inspirational things to think about. But this morning, from the start of the whole day I just could not seem to get my brain to focus. Sometimes this happens due to not enough sleep or not eating breakfast or something along those lines. So I try and pray it away, so that by the time the sermon comes, my brain and spirit and heart are ready to take in what is about to be said. This morning was different.
Have you ever felt the Holy Spirit nudging you to GET AWAY? Not in a crazy parental "GET AWAY!" situation, but picture me this. Your on your way to eat with a group of people after church, and you feel in your spirit your Lover and Creator whispering "Don't go with them. Come away with ME, my beloved. I want you all to myself." ? (This happens to me alot, and I ADORE time away with my King). Well, this morning, the distraction did not come from outside. It came from within. That same voice. That same Holy Spirit nudging me, telling me "I need your voice to do something about my bride (bride being the church). Write this down..."
I don't know about you guys, but when I get directions from God-I LISTEN! So I took out some paper and my Bible and like a crazy person started writing down all that He had to say. For those of you who know me, know that I take personally things that happen within the body of Christ (whether it be in my own congregation or halfway across the world) and one of the main reasons is because there are too many people out there who do not get it, and my passion is for children and I will fight tooth and nail to the death to make sure we bring up a generation of kiddos who DO get it (and this is hard when the adults teaching them still do not get it). So, I say that to say this....this blog could have EASILY just been another rant about what is wrong with the church today, things I want to change, etc. But I am (only human first of all so bear with me if there is still some "Meg" in here) going to do my best to deliver a message I truly feel God wanted spoken through me.
So, here it is. This is what I did in church today:
"CHURCH"
--Leadership should not compromise their true beliefs (things they know to be a TRUTH) in order to make people (congregation) feel comfortable. That is not "teaching" anything.
An example that came to mind here is parenting. If you KNOW that drinking and driving is dangerous and you hold true to that in your personal beliefs, wouldnt you also try to teach your children that same thing? If your 9 year old son (who does not know better and does not know truth like you do in this situation) was 'uncomfortable' with your stance on the issue, and decided that collectively your family was going to start drinking and driving, would you remain silent? This is not only giving your 9year old son leadership in your family, but it is compromising your personal beliefs. It may not seem that way, because sure in your head silently you know it is wrong to drink and drive, but not saying anything to help guide others to that conclusion is just as bad as handing them a bottle and saying "here, take off"
**Of course this is a completely dramatic example, but if you truly think about it this happens with people in leadership postions all the time. I would imagine (and this is Meg talking here) that it is unbearably difficult to be a leader of a large amount of people. People with different interests, different traditions they grew up with, different opinions. But when you strip back all of the other (and Im going to say this) JUNK, what should be at the absolute core is TRUTH. God told us how to live, how he expects us behave, how we should minister, what the church should look like but more importantly BE. And when all is stripped away, are those truths still at the foundation of the church today?
(Back to God speaking to me this morning)
--we should also not cator to making people feel comfortable because
1. We are NOT called to live as Lukewarm Christians. Revelation 3: 15-16 says "I know all the things you do, that you are neither hot nor cold. I wish that you were one or the other! But since you are like lukewarm water, neither hot not cold, I will SPIT YOU OUT OF MY MOUTH!"
(I dont know about you guys but I do not look fondly on being spit out of the mouth of my very precious savior and redeemer!)
2. If we attempt to cater to making people feel comfortable then we are only proving that all that matters is the amount of bodies in the building.
--Yes, it is important to draw people into "church" but church is NOT A BUILDING. Church is a FAMILY!
--People are SAVED by God not by people. An God CHOOSES whom He will save. (Eph. 1:5-6, Acts 13:48, Rev. 17:8).
**This idea does not discontinue church buildings or congregations meeting (what most people carelessly refer to as "church") but it instead, re-enstates the truth that is having an encounter with God in order to truly understand. People can most definitely encounter God in a church building and become saved....but they can also find God on the streets, in McDonalds, at a volleyball game. He is going to find you in His perfect timing and according to His perfect plan. We (as the body of Christ to non-believers) I feel, are here to facilitate community and fellowship and teaching God's message and sharing his LOVE!
What does this have to do with the previous idea? Well, it backs up that there is MUCH more to it then the amount of bodies in a pew. ((At this point of the blog, I very much wanted to use the example of the desciples asking Jesus why he spoke in parables and his answer (Mark 4) about the masses not understanding his message and equate that to a preacher dictating his sermon on making his 'audience' comfortable with what he's saying-However, this scripture being used for that reason could be up for debate as in this time God had not yet given us the Holy Spirit to guide us (which only proves my point basically about weeding out those in church who come to hear a nice lesson versus those in church who are starving and hungry for the word and the truth as God meant for it to be heard) but we will leave it alone for now))
The things mentioned above are what God asked me to write down while I was in church this morning. Yes, they do mirror what I believe (which is a good thing right? haha) and where my opinion was inserted I was sure to tell you when It was me and not Him. I want to put as simply as I can, just how I feel in general about church today (not my congregation specifically, not one Ive been too, no preachers or elders or anyone being called out here, just my own personal thoughts about the body of christ as a whole):
As Christians who believe, it is our job to spread God's message and LOVE the heck out of others (believers and non-believers). We do not have to just accomplish this through a building at the beginning of every week. I feel church would be an excellent place for those who are starving for the word and yearning to learn more about God and to fall deeper in love with Him, to refuel so to speak. To be FED. And to fellowship with other believers so relationships are formed and it no longer becomes as hard walking this path! Only then are we fed can we spread God's love and His message to others as best we humanly can. Church should not be about the number of "member" or the budget to keep the building air conditioned or how many songs we do or do not sing during worship. Church should be a place where the Holy Spirit overflows and we as believers are in the presence of God. It should not be about formality and times and structure. But should have the freedom for God to show up if He wants to! It is a place to teach children the best decisions to be making for their lives, how to love others, and how much God truly adores them! Out of church should grow people who are madly in love with the Lord, who dance with Him daily, who venture outside of their own life to help others or love others or simply recognize someone other than themselves. It is a place where people should feel welcome and loved the minute they walk through the door, and not a place where people are forced through the door to hear a message they dont understand anyway. Church should not be in the four walls of a building but flowing out into the workplace and schools and the community. (And I could seriously go on all day, but I wont)
I have an AMAZING familiy at my congregation. And for the denomination it chooses to associate with, we are extremely progressive. But we are not called to be a progressive COC in NEA who looks radical compared to the rest of the COC's in NEA. We are called to live lives set apart and radical for God when compared to the rest of the entire secular world.
When it comes to church taking a stand and doing something on this planet, I feel the time for babysteps has come to an end.
I hope that what I have said has not offended but yet, inspired any who choose to read my words. I am simply another person with a voice. But, I am willing to understand when Im in the wrong and learn when I have things to learn.
In Him,
Meg
However, as part of this following Christ deal, I am now a part of a FAMILY. Family who seeks to help each other out, walking this difficult road in life and holding each other accountable for believing what we believe. So when I feel I see something happening, that lends no strengths to the collective body of Christ as a whole, I tend to want to say something.
Versus ranting and raving about church, versus throwing hissy fits trying to get things to change, and versus being completely silent hoping we progress as the body of Christ (and then leaving the church altogether when we don't)...I am going to, SPEAK.
In church this morning, I tried VERY hard to pay attention, which normally is not difficult for me at all because I adore our preacher and he always has extremely inspirational things to think about. But this morning, from the start of the whole day I just could not seem to get my brain to focus. Sometimes this happens due to not enough sleep or not eating breakfast or something along those lines. So I try and pray it away, so that by the time the sermon comes, my brain and spirit and heart are ready to take in what is about to be said. This morning was different.
Have you ever felt the Holy Spirit nudging you to GET AWAY? Not in a crazy parental "GET AWAY!" situation, but picture me this. Your on your way to eat with a group of people after church, and you feel in your spirit your Lover and Creator whispering "Don't go with them. Come away with ME, my beloved. I want you all to myself." ? (This happens to me alot, and I ADORE time away with my King). Well, this morning, the distraction did not come from outside. It came from within. That same voice. That same Holy Spirit nudging me, telling me "I need your voice to do something about my bride (bride being the church). Write this down..."
I don't know about you guys, but when I get directions from God-I LISTEN! So I took out some paper and my Bible and like a crazy person started writing down all that He had to say. For those of you who know me, know that I take personally things that happen within the body of Christ (whether it be in my own congregation or halfway across the world) and one of the main reasons is because there are too many people out there who do not get it, and my passion is for children and I will fight tooth and nail to the death to make sure we bring up a generation of kiddos who DO get it (and this is hard when the adults teaching them still do not get it). So, I say that to say this....this blog could have EASILY just been another rant about what is wrong with the church today, things I want to change, etc. But I am (only human first of all so bear with me if there is still some "Meg" in here) going to do my best to deliver a message I truly feel God wanted spoken through me.
So, here it is. This is what I did in church today:
"CHURCH"
--Leadership should not compromise their true beliefs (things they know to be a TRUTH) in order to make people (congregation) feel comfortable. That is not "teaching" anything.
An example that came to mind here is parenting. If you KNOW that drinking and driving is dangerous and you hold true to that in your personal beliefs, wouldnt you also try to teach your children that same thing? If your 9 year old son (who does not know better and does not know truth like you do in this situation) was 'uncomfortable' with your stance on the issue, and decided that collectively your family was going to start drinking and driving, would you remain silent? This is not only giving your 9year old son leadership in your family, but it is compromising your personal beliefs. It may not seem that way, because sure in your head silently you know it is wrong to drink and drive, but not saying anything to help guide others to that conclusion is just as bad as handing them a bottle and saying "here, take off"
**Of course this is a completely dramatic example, but if you truly think about it this happens with people in leadership postions all the time. I would imagine (and this is Meg talking here) that it is unbearably difficult to be a leader of a large amount of people. People with different interests, different traditions they grew up with, different opinions. But when you strip back all of the other (and Im going to say this) JUNK, what should be at the absolute core is TRUTH. God told us how to live, how he expects us behave, how we should minister, what the church should look like but more importantly BE. And when all is stripped away, are those truths still at the foundation of the church today?
(Back to God speaking to me this morning)
--we should also not cator to making people feel comfortable because
1. We are NOT called to live as Lukewarm Christians. Revelation 3: 15-16 says "I know all the things you do, that you are neither hot nor cold. I wish that you were one or the other! But since you are like lukewarm water, neither hot not cold, I will SPIT YOU OUT OF MY MOUTH!"
(I dont know about you guys but I do not look fondly on being spit out of the mouth of my very precious savior and redeemer!)
2. If we attempt to cater to making people feel comfortable then we are only proving that all that matters is the amount of bodies in the building.
--Yes, it is important to draw people into "church" but church is NOT A BUILDING. Church is a FAMILY!
--People are SAVED by God not by people. An God CHOOSES whom He will save. (Eph. 1:5-6, Acts 13:48, Rev. 17:8).
**This idea does not discontinue church buildings or congregations meeting (what most people carelessly refer to as "church") but it instead, re-enstates the truth that is having an encounter with God in order to truly understand. People can most definitely encounter God in a church building and become saved....but they can also find God on the streets, in McDonalds, at a volleyball game. He is going to find you in His perfect timing and according to His perfect plan. We (as the body of Christ to non-believers) I feel, are here to facilitate community and fellowship and teaching God's message and sharing his LOVE!
What does this have to do with the previous idea? Well, it backs up that there is MUCH more to it then the amount of bodies in a pew. ((At this point of the blog, I very much wanted to use the example of the desciples asking Jesus why he spoke in parables and his answer (Mark 4) about the masses not understanding his message and equate that to a preacher dictating his sermon on making his 'audience' comfortable with what he's saying-However, this scripture being used for that reason could be up for debate as in this time God had not yet given us the Holy Spirit to guide us (which only proves my point basically about weeding out those in church who come to hear a nice lesson versus those in church who are starving and hungry for the word and the truth as God meant for it to be heard) but we will leave it alone for now))
The things mentioned above are what God asked me to write down while I was in church this morning. Yes, they do mirror what I believe (which is a good thing right? haha) and where my opinion was inserted I was sure to tell you when It was me and not Him. I want to put as simply as I can, just how I feel in general about church today (not my congregation specifically, not one Ive been too, no preachers or elders or anyone being called out here, just my own personal thoughts about the body of christ as a whole):
As Christians who believe, it is our job to spread God's message and LOVE the heck out of others (believers and non-believers). We do not have to just accomplish this through a building at the beginning of every week. I feel church would be an excellent place for those who are starving for the word and yearning to learn more about God and to fall deeper in love with Him, to refuel so to speak. To be FED. And to fellowship with other believers so relationships are formed and it no longer becomes as hard walking this path! Only then are we fed can we spread God's love and His message to others as best we humanly can. Church should not be about the number of "member" or the budget to keep the building air conditioned or how many songs we do or do not sing during worship. Church should be a place where the Holy Spirit overflows and we as believers are in the presence of God. It should not be about formality and times and structure. But should have the freedom for God to show up if He wants to! It is a place to teach children the best decisions to be making for their lives, how to love others, and how much God truly adores them! Out of church should grow people who are madly in love with the Lord, who dance with Him daily, who venture outside of their own life to help others or love others or simply recognize someone other than themselves. It is a place where people should feel welcome and loved the minute they walk through the door, and not a place where people are forced through the door to hear a message they dont understand anyway. Church should not be in the four walls of a building but flowing out into the workplace and schools and the community. (And I could seriously go on all day, but I wont)
I have an AMAZING familiy at my congregation. And for the denomination it chooses to associate with, we are extremely progressive. But we are not called to be a progressive COC in NEA who looks radical compared to the rest of the COC's in NEA. We are called to live lives set apart and radical for God when compared to the rest of the entire secular world.
When it comes to church taking a stand and doing something on this planet, I feel the time for babysteps has come to an end.
I hope that what I have said has not offended but yet, inspired any who choose to read my words. I am simply another person with a voice. But, I am willing to understand when Im in the wrong and learn when I have things to learn.
In Him,
Meg
Friday, January 14, 2011
Someone's About to Get FOUL Up in There!
15 year old girls are fascinating for numerous reasons. They talk in foreign and unknown languages ("OMG I'm about to get foul up on you, if you don't shut the front-door, Edna!"). Their addictions mirror objects either eskimos or 90yr old women would find handy (i.e. Ugg boots and Vera Bradley handbags). And their moodswings might cause anyone within a 5 foot radius verbal whiplash ( *screaming* "MMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!" *smiling* "I love you"). But, these are not the tales to be told in this particular blog, no. I am here to write about the more recent fascination of 15 year old girls (and no, it is not to teen pregnancy shows because that is a WHOLE 'nother ballgame) but instead, to the interest in prison life!
And I won't lie, I am just as addicted to shows like LockUp as the next person, but have found it curious why a young girl (my cousin *to remain discrete we will call her Smashley* to be more specific) finds this topic so enticing. There has yet to be an explination on why this subject matter is so addicting to her, but you can be if Lock Up is on I will be getting a text that says "LOCKUP!!!!" haha. I find it hysterical actually.
But last night, the humor was sucked out of the scenario of my little Smashley (jokingly of course) saying she wanted to see what prison was really like because it was so interesting, when I stumbled across a new show on A&E called "Beyond Scared Straight". This show takes at-risk youth into prison to basically scare the hell out of them, in attempts to set their path straight. The episode on last night was a group of young girls, ages 12-17. Again, I was sucked into the allure of learning about prison life. However, this time it was a little different.
These teens were allocated there through some type of program, counseler or parent recomendation, probation, etc. Their offenses? Vandalism, robbery, kidnapping, terroristic threats, fighting, underage drinking, drugs, etc. Throughout the course of this day the girls are given a tour of the prison by a select handful of innmates (yes, they were hardcore). At another point in the day the girls hear of some of the prisoners stories and how they ended up there. One girl, now in her late 20's, is serving a 15-life sentence for (2nd degree murder) for basically, being a party girl. She was wasted at a party, told a group of guys whom she had enticed that "so and so" had some money she wanted, and they went and killed the guy in front of her. Hearing her story broke her heart, because you could see in her eyes and through her tears, and through her desperate pleas to these young girls to turn their life around, that she had truly changed-and seen the error of her ways. But she will, more than likely, forever be a prisoner being punished for a crime she is remorseful over.
During a tour of the courtyard (I say tour, but really it is a chance for the young girls to be harrassed and tortured by the innmates there) one of the 12 year old girl's saw her mother. The mother pleaded with the daughter "I dont want to see you in here. PLEASE dont make the same mistakes I have!" and so on and so forth.
For some of these children, the experience was life-changing. For a few, it did nothing to help. Throughout the course of the show, at various times, I found myself sobbing for these young girls. Hearing about how they smoke weed and party and fight in school. They all cussed very frequently, completely disrespected their moms or dads, and all had SO much anger inside of them.
Hear me now audience. SATAN IS ATTACKING OUR YOUTH. Yes. ATTACKING. OUR. YOUTH. We've known it is true, but are we actively doing anything to stop or prevent it? Of the 10 girls in the program do you want to know a common denominator for 90%? Living in a single parent home. Of that 90%, over half were abandoned by a parent where the other 30-40% were a product of divorce. SATAN IS ATTACKING OUR YOUTH THROUGH BREAKING UP OUR FAMILIES.
If marriage (and when I say "if" I am saying, this is a FACT) glorifies God then Satan is going to do his very best to DESTROY marriages. If you are MARRIED and you find yourself one day looking at your partner thinking "hmm...I just dont think I love them anymore" Uh, NYELLOW!? SATAN! If you are MARRIED and you wakeup one day having found yourself in an affair for over a year unsure of how you got there, Uh NYELLOW? SATAN!! (WHOA, did NOT mean to get off on a marriage tangent. That's a whole nother ballgame as well.)
Back to our kiddos. Ok. So these girls are angry and sobbing out for help. They are dying to feel loved. Dying to feel accepted. And dying to feel wanted by those around them. As a parent, as church, as aunts, as uncles, as ADULTS, it is OUR JOB to ensure that these children KNOW how much they are loved, KNOW how much they are wanted, and KNOW they are accepted by us. Because when they without a doubt or question in their mind believe that is true, they can more easily believe and accept and FEEL the TRUE, UNCONDITIONAL love of Christ. I am living testimony to being a product of not only abandonment but also divorce. I am living testimony to NOT feeling wanted by my parents. I am living testimony to NOT having family who fought for me and fought for my heart. I am living testimony to being left out in the cold and then feeling like I am a burden on all the angels who have attempted to help me out along the way. Because SATAN wants me to continue to feel unloved, unwanted, and unaccepted. He starts running these programs so early in life that it is SCARY!
I know I am not a parent, but I had parents once. I am someone who statistically shouldve ended up a HELL of alot worse but through the Love and Grace of God amongst prayer warriors and angels He has sent to protect me along the way, I have made it through the other side. Not in jail. Not pregnant. With no STD's, with no bad record, with a semi-great attitude. And most importantly. MY LIFE.
But I...am one of the lucky ones. And last night's show reminded me how we all need so desperately need to be PRAYING for our youth that they may know the love of God. PRAYING for their parents and families, that they will NOT listen to the lies of satan but instead to the truth of God. PRAYING for our teachers and counselors and coaches who handle these kids on a daily basis. PRAYING for our youth ministers, that they stop treating youth group like a party and start teaching these kids how to desciple and speak truth and Christi-identity into the lives of their peers! When you look into the eyes of a stranger at the grocery store, you may never know if they are on the front lines of a child's life-a child who may only be hanging on by a thread. LET US STOP ALLOWING SATAN TO ENGULF OUR CHILDREN THROUGH MEANS IN WHICH WE ESSENTIALLY HAVE CONTROL (at least a heck of alot more control then they do).
The brokenness in our youth today, has GOT to end somewhere. Why not here.
Meg
And I won't lie, I am just as addicted to shows like LockUp as the next person, but have found it curious why a young girl (my cousin *to remain discrete we will call her Smashley* to be more specific) finds this topic so enticing. There has yet to be an explination on why this subject matter is so addicting to her, but you can be if Lock Up is on I will be getting a text that says "LOCKUP!!!!" haha. I find it hysterical actually.
But last night, the humor was sucked out of the scenario of my little Smashley (jokingly of course) saying she wanted to see what prison was really like because it was so interesting, when I stumbled across a new show on A&E called "Beyond Scared Straight". This show takes at-risk youth into prison to basically scare the hell out of them, in attempts to set their path straight. The episode on last night was a group of young girls, ages 12-17. Again, I was sucked into the allure of learning about prison life. However, this time it was a little different.
These teens were allocated there through some type of program, counseler or parent recomendation, probation, etc. Their offenses? Vandalism, robbery, kidnapping, terroristic threats, fighting, underage drinking, drugs, etc. Throughout the course of this day the girls are given a tour of the prison by a select handful of innmates (yes, they were hardcore). At another point in the day the girls hear of some of the prisoners stories and how they ended up there. One girl, now in her late 20's, is serving a 15-life sentence for (2nd degree murder) for basically, being a party girl. She was wasted at a party, told a group of guys whom she had enticed that "so and so" had some money she wanted, and they went and killed the guy in front of her. Hearing her story broke her heart, because you could see in her eyes and through her tears, and through her desperate pleas to these young girls to turn their life around, that she had truly changed-and seen the error of her ways. But she will, more than likely, forever be a prisoner being punished for a crime she is remorseful over.
During a tour of the courtyard (I say tour, but really it is a chance for the young girls to be harrassed and tortured by the innmates there) one of the 12 year old girl's saw her mother. The mother pleaded with the daughter "I dont want to see you in here. PLEASE dont make the same mistakes I have!" and so on and so forth.
For some of these children, the experience was life-changing. For a few, it did nothing to help. Throughout the course of the show, at various times, I found myself sobbing for these young girls. Hearing about how they smoke weed and party and fight in school. They all cussed very frequently, completely disrespected their moms or dads, and all had SO much anger inside of them.
Hear me now audience. SATAN IS ATTACKING OUR YOUTH. Yes. ATTACKING. OUR. YOUTH. We've known it is true, but are we actively doing anything to stop or prevent it? Of the 10 girls in the program do you want to know a common denominator for 90%? Living in a single parent home. Of that 90%, over half were abandoned by a parent where the other 30-40% were a product of divorce. SATAN IS ATTACKING OUR YOUTH THROUGH BREAKING UP OUR FAMILIES.
If marriage (and when I say "if" I am saying, this is a FACT) glorifies God then Satan is going to do his very best to DESTROY marriages. If you are MARRIED and you find yourself one day looking at your partner thinking "hmm...I just dont think I love them anymore" Uh, NYELLOW!? SATAN! If you are MARRIED and you wakeup one day having found yourself in an affair for over a year unsure of how you got there, Uh NYELLOW? SATAN!! (WHOA, did NOT mean to get off on a marriage tangent. That's a whole nother ballgame as well.)
Back to our kiddos. Ok. So these girls are angry and sobbing out for help. They are dying to feel loved. Dying to feel accepted. And dying to feel wanted by those around them. As a parent, as church, as aunts, as uncles, as ADULTS, it is OUR JOB to ensure that these children KNOW how much they are loved, KNOW how much they are wanted, and KNOW they are accepted by us. Because when they without a doubt or question in their mind believe that is true, they can more easily believe and accept and FEEL the TRUE, UNCONDITIONAL love of Christ. I am living testimony to being a product of not only abandonment but also divorce. I am living testimony to NOT feeling wanted by my parents. I am living testimony to NOT having family who fought for me and fought for my heart. I am living testimony to being left out in the cold and then feeling like I am a burden on all the angels who have attempted to help me out along the way. Because SATAN wants me to continue to feel unloved, unwanted, and unaccepted. He starts running these programs so early in life that it is SCARY!
I know I am not a parent, but I had parents once. I am someone who statistically shouldve ended up a HELL of alot worse but through the Love and Grace of God amongst prayer warriors and angels He has sent to protect me along the way, I have made it through the other side. Not in jail. Not pregnant. With no STD's, with no bad record, with a semi-great attitude. And most importantly. MY LIFE.
But I...am one of the lucky ones. And last night's show reminded me how we all need so desperately need to be PRAYING for our youth that they may know the love of God. PRAYING for their parents and families, that they will NOT listen to the lies of satan but instead to the truth of God. PRAYING for our teachers and counselors and coaches who handle these kids on a daily basis. PRAYING for our youth ministers, that they stop treating youth group like a party and start teaching these kids how to desciple and speak truth and Christi-identity into the lives of their peers! When you look into the eyes of a stranger at the grocery store, you may never know if they are on the front lines of a child's life-a child who may only be hanging on by a thread. LET US STOP ALLOWING SATAN TO ENGULF OUR CHILDREN THROUGH MEANS IN WHICH WE ESSENTIALLY HAVE CONTROL (at least a heck of alot more control then they do).
The brokenness in our youth today, has GOT to end somewhere. Why not here.
Meg
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Electric Slide Right on My Heart Why don't Ya!
"He and I had something beautiful, but so dysfunctional it couldn't last. I loved him so, but I let him go cause I knew he'd never love me back. Such pain as this shouldn't have to be experienced. I'm still reeling from the loss, still a little bit delirious." (A FINE FRENZY)
They say "sticks and stones can break my bones but words may never hurt me"...."THEY"...were WRONG. Words can hurt. Very much.
"Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you. Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won't fall through...Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone. Don't ya think I was too young to be messed with the girl in the dress cried the whole way home....I should have known."
(TAYLOR SWIFT)
So then why do we do it? Say mean words? Repeat mean words? Say things we don't mean? Break promises we never intended to keep? Write notes to our friends that would hurt others feelings if they read it? Keep a diary full of hateful words we would be grounded for if our parents ever found? Why do we let words hurt us at all?
"Each time you'd pull down the driveway I wasn't sure when I would see you again. Yours was a twisted blind-sided highway, no matter which road you took then. Oh you set up your place in my thoughts, moved in and made my thinking crowded. Now we're out in the back with the barking dogs, my heart the red sun, your heart the moon clouded." (INDIGO GIRLS)
It isn't very often that I allow myself to listen to secular music. Not because I think there is particularly anything so wrong with it, but simply because...it hurts. But, today was a random day where kLove just wasn't cutting it for me, I was tired of my Francesca Batistelli cd, and I wanted something to JAM to, something to SING with, and something to FEEL! So, I popped in the A Fine Frenzy cd. Her music is very, very exceptional. But at the same token, very, very heartbreaking. I immediately found myself glued to the same 3 songs I used to always listen to so many years ago, and sucked back into a memory I did not wish to be a part of. I was there, in that moment a few years ago, after having just been dumped, driving around at midnight, listening to heartbreaking music and crying (hopefully to all of my many readers, it will come as no surprise that girls do this sometimes when we have been dumped....or at least, I do this after being dumped!) I shook the memory out of my head, focusing back on the reality at hand which was that I was driving through town in the middle of the day, not particularly upset about anything, and definitely not remembering a breakup with whats his face several years ago. And immediately...God spoke to me.
I believe after a breakup, there is an instinct need for (women anyway) to wallow in self-pity, drowning our sorrows in mint-chocolate chip ice cream, and driving around with our girlfriends listening to breakup songs and crying. No, not the most productive way to rid a broken heart but what is one night going to hurt?.....Right? Well, I am not so sure any more. See, I will admit to the world (because I am betting I am not alone in this) that I do this once after a breakup, sure. But you will undoubtedly find me doing this, periodically, and sometimes months or years later. Still "healing" from the same breakup? Well, probably not. But still listening to the same music, and experiencing the same feelings as if I am. Does this, then, leave room for God to heal my wounds and my broken heart? If I so easily will be sucked back into the past as if He had never rescued and healed me to begin with?
I think that is what we do sometimes when we revisit old wounds that way. And I used music as an example, because that is what most often does it for me. Sure, there are guys I have dated that I need no physical reminder that he was once there because I remember it every second of the day, and every second of the day am trying to forget it. To this day, there are still bands and songs I can not listen to because it physically hurts my heart too much. There are places I can not go. Things I can not eat. I am not free.... and today I heard God whispering to me "let me free you"
But how? Well, He asked me to write this blog. Talking about the difference between the need to wallow in self pity for a little while versus acts of self-destruction that disable us from healing properly. So in my example with music, listening to this old music did several things: 1. attempted to reverse a program in my heart/brain that God is trying to run now (Satan. Damn you.) 2. tempted me to text or call old boyfriends whom I know I should not try and contact (Satan, you little rascal!) and 3. killed my perfectly joyous mood I have just by being in love with my God and brought me to surface with "the woes of the world" (OOOoooh he is sneaky!). See, satan doesn't want us to heal. So he is going to make this music so enticing, that even those few times we decide to pop it in every now and then, he has done his part, and the memories will take care of themselves: leaving us fragile women (and men in some cases) balled up on the floor, a disheveled mess, wondering (when the song is over) why we are so upset?
Again, do not hear me say that this is strictly music. Because it can be anything. Looking through old photo albums, going through home videos, smelling a particular scent, going to familiar places....all good ways to wallow over the past, a past that God is trying to HEAL you from and satan is trying to REMIND you of.
So what do we do about this? We fight back. In the case with my music....I know I am not strong enough alone to get rid of these songs that hurt me so so badly. (because I am a music LOVER and this is some GOOD music) BUT-I love God MORE than this music, and even more than I love Him and my music...is how much HE loves me. And how SO BADLY He doesn't want me to hurt, or suffer from what others have done to me. He does not want me crying over my broken heart because every second of every day He is working to mend it back together in a way that only HE can. And when He does, it will never be broken like that again. So in my case...I pray. Pray for strength.
Let's examine the Truth here. Which one helps more. This:
"I wrote a couple notes, one in love, one in anger. They're lyin' there dying in the dresser drawer. Lived louder than my voice, struggled through a stranger. He loved me til I loved you even more...Now I can't laugh, can't cry. And I can't run, can't hide. What do I gotta do? What do I gotta do to keep you? What do I gotta do to keep you...from doing this to me?" (SUGARLAND)
OR This:
"Your name is JESUS. Your name is JESUS. You're the Wonderful, Counselor, my Friend. You're what I hold onto, I know that You've brought me through, all the days of loss...to the cross You knew...that I'd need a SAVIOR." (AMONG THE THIRSTY)
Like I said before, God asked me to share this message, and I write it to whoever out there is reading to convict you just as much if not more to me, to convict myself of my own actions as well. It is alot easier said than done, not just giving God your heart now but giving Him your past too...so that He can heal every ounce of you. That is what He LONGS to do for you, beloved. Yes, we have a Creator who loves us THAT much. So believe it.
"But in my distress I cried out to the Lord; yes, I prayed to my God for help. He heard me from His sanctuary; my cry to Him reached His ears." Psalm 18:6
What are you holding onto today that God is asking you to let go, so that He can truly heal your broken heart? Are you willing to give it up? To trust that no man, no song, no memory could EVER amount to the Love of our Savior?
In Him,
Meg
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Downward Dogged to my Death
First and foremost, if you have ever attempted "hot yoga"then I applaud you.
For those of you who havent....I would NEVER recommend it. Hot yoga is where 20 plus people gather into a room the size of a closet to do yoga. No, the "hot" part of hot yoga isnt the sweaty body, but the 20 plus heaters that line the floors and walls of the room. I did hot yoga for the first and very last time today. After 30plus minutes of conditioning in the 100plus degree room, I thought "I just may pass out". When my head started floating above my body and I was losing vision I thought "I'm pretty sure....I am about to meet Jesus!" At that point, I gathered my things and so rudely ran out of the room into the cool lobby. Where I then preceded to collapse onto the cool concrete floor until I regained some consciousness. After about ten minutes or so, while everyone else was still in class, I decided to run for it. Oh but life is never that easy is it? The door was locked (and very meticulously I might add). This was it. I was going to die in a yoga studio. I eventually figured out the mechanics and with no shoes, no coat, in below 30 degree weather...I made a run for it. All the way to my car, never looking back. Once in my car, I decided the ONLY thing I could do to revive myself was to go to McDonalds and get a happy meal...which is exactly what I did! (Always good to have an emergency back up plan if ya know what I mean!)
Needless to say, hot yoga is one thing being crossed off of my 2011 Bucket List. (Sadly, hot yoga was never even ON my Bucket List. So now I have to write it in, acting like I actually ever wanted to try it, and then cross it off! Just to prove my ego something and to not have officially wasted 45minutes of my young life.)
Is this post about yoga? Well, no not really. In church this morning, I heard something said that reminded me of where I was this time last year, and all of the progress Ive made in my walk with God. And I thought, thank the LORD for great friends who helped guide me to where I am today, because without them and their unfailing love and their great advice and their prayers and encouragement, I would not be this ravishing creature blogging before you now (haha, ok ok hot yoga was a real blow to the old ego so I have to get my kicks where I can!)
So having passed the mark now of being a "Christian" over a full year, I wanted to share some things Ive learned and some advice that has gotten me through.
1. God is ALWAYS good and ALWAYS faithful, and He will work things out in His perfect time. (of course, I relearn this one all the time)
2. Ask questions. I had "go-to" people who, at all hours of the night, would answer my random questions. If there was a scripture I didnt understand or something bothering me, they were always there. Which leads me to my next one....
3. Surround yourself with other Christians whom you trust and who can help you. Life is hard, and we were never created to do it alone. Even Jesus had his besties and He counted on them. It is ok to ask for help and it is ok to admit that you can't do it alone!
4. Don't strive to do the right things, say the right words, or look like the best Christian. God knows your heart, and knows when youre faking it. Instead...
5. Strive to KNOW God...
6. Get to know His character by READING HIS WORD (they dont tell you this in Bible school for kicks and giggles, the Bible is TRULY meant to help you!)
7. Fall in love with God. Do not treat God like your boss, because He wants to be SO much more to us then that. He is our lover, our rescuer, our husband, our protector, our counseler, our BEST FRIEND! So TREAT HIM THAT WAY!
8. Understand that we are called to live very specific lives set apart from the world. To some people, this means being "radical" but to radicalists, this means living the way we were CREATED to live. If you dont know what this means then you are probably not doing something radical, but thats ok. We live and we learn, and as you are reading this...I hope you are learning!
9. When counseling other people and helping others get through a hard time, understand that YOU CAN NOT SAVE SOMEONE from themselves! If WE could save, we would have never needed a SAVIOR! (This is hard for peeps like me who want to rush in and "fix" things. Sometimes, we are just meant to LOVE on people. Because God is the only one who can heal, fix, and SAVE!)
10. When you have weird feelings, sense a dark change, dont feel like yourself, or are experiencing seasons or times of (fill in the blank negative feeling), dont just chalk that up to (fill in the blank usual excuse, ie. period, hard day at work, kids driving you nuts, etc). Sometimes, those FEELINGS we get is because we are experiencing spiritual warfare! Satan attacks us ALL the time through our loved ones, families, etc, and when you chalk it up to "oh my husband is just being grumpy" pretty soon that "grumpiness" turns into violence, or an affair, or abandonement. Anything can get out of control when you dont work to fix it, and if we as Christians continue to walk through life like there isnt a devil who is trying to bring us down then he will always win! SPIRITUAL WARFARE IS SOOOO STINKING REAL!!!
11. Realize that you have the POWER of GOD, dwelling inside you. We as people have no power, but God inside of us has ALL of the power. With Him, we really can do ANYTHING. SO wrap your little brain around that piece of info and GO CHANGE THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (theres no excuses! Shoo! Go on!! Get outta here!)
Of course there is SOOOOO much more that I have learned this year, and maybe I can share a little more each time I write. These things are not just lines on a page to me, or words out of a mouth, or advice in a self help book....these are part of my program now. God has reprogrammed my heart, to stop believing in the poisenous lies it once believed, to now believing the TRUTH! And the TRUTH, my friend, will set you FREE!!
I feel SO blessed to have found my faith later in life. Not only do I have a kick-butt testimony (which rocks out some how good God is) but I also did not have a "mold" to break. So many people who grew up in church or had religion shoved down their throats as a kid has a hard time figuring it out on their own. What is their own beliefs versus their parents? Why have I done this for 30 years to find out it really means nothing to me? Why dont I do this more? etc etc....these are GREAT questions to be asking yourself!! Finding my true identity through Christ has been the most excellent journey I have ever gotten to embark upon! I hope you who are reading this feel the same way...and if you dont, maybe something is missing! Im just a young girl, trying to find her voice, but if there is anything I can do to help....me and Jesus are here. Ready to listen. Ready to love :)
In Him,
Meg
For those of you who havent....I would NEVER recommend it. Hot yoga is where 20 plus people gather into a room the size of a closet to do yoga. No, the "hot" part of hot yoga isnt the sweaty body, but the 20 plus heaters that line the floors and walls of the room. I did hot yoga for the first and very last time today. After 30plus minutes of conditioning in the 100plus degree room, I thought "I just may pass out". When my head started floating above my body and I was losing vision I thought "I'm pretty sure....I am about to meet Jesus!" At that point, I gathered my things and so rudely ran out of the room into the cool lobby. Where I then preceded to collapse onto the cool concrete floor until I regained some consciousness. After about ten minutes or so, while everyone else was still in class, I decided to run for it. Oh but life is never that easy is it? The door was locked (and very meticulously I might add). This was it. I was going to die in a yoga studio. I eventually figured out the mechanics and with no shoes, no coat, in below 30 degree weather...I made a run for it. All the way to my car, never looking back. Once in my car, I decided the ONLY thing I could do to revive myself was to go to McDonalds and get a happy meal...which is exactly what I did! (Always good to have an emergency back up plan if ya know what I mean!)
Needless to say, hot yoga is one thing being crossed off of my 2011 Bucket List. (Sadly, hot yoga was never even ON my Bucket List. So now I have to write it in, acting like I actually ever wanted to try it, and then cross it off! Just to prove my ego something and to not have officially wasted 45minutes of my young life.)
Is this post about yoga? Well, no not really. In church this morning, I heard something said that reminded me of where I was this time last year, and all of the progress Ive made in my walk with God. And I thought, thank the LORD for great friends who helped guide me to where I am today, because without them and their unfailing love and their great advice and their prayers and encouragement, I would not be this ravishing creature blogging before you now (haha, ok ok hot yoga was a real blow to the old ego so I have to get my kicks where I can!)
So having passed the mark now of being a "Christian" over a full year, I wanted to share some things Ive learned and some advice that has gotten me through.
1. God is ALWAYS good and ALWAYS faithful, and He will work things out in His perfect time. (of course, I relearn this one all the time)
2. Ask questions. I had "go-to" people who, at all hours of the night, would answer my random questions. If there was a scripture I didnt understand or something bothering me, they were always there. Which leads me to my next one....
3. Surround yourself with other Christians whom you trust and who can help you. Life is hard, and we were never created to do it alone. Even Jesus had his besties and He counted on them. It is ok to ask for help and it is ok to admit that you can't do it alone!
4. Don't strive to do the right things, say the right words, or look like the best Christian. God knows your heart, and knows when youre faking it. Instead...
5. Strive to KNOW God...
6. Get to know His character by READING HIS WORD (they dont tell you this in Bible school for kicks and giggles, the Bible is TRULY meant to help you!)
7. Fall in love with God. Do not treat God like your boss, because He wants to be SO much more to us then that. He is our lover, our rescuer, our husband, our protector, our counseler, our BEST FRIEND! So TREAT HIM THAT WAY!
8. Understand that we are called to live very specific lives set apart from the world. To some people, this means being "radical" but to radicalists, this means living the way we were CREATED to live. If you dont know what this means then you are probably not doing something radical, but thats ok. We live and we learn, and as you are reading this...I hope you are learning!
9. When counseling other people and helping others get through a hard time, understand that YOU CAN NOT SAVE SOMEONE from themselves! If WE could save, we would have never needed a SAVIOR! (This is hard for peeps like me who want to rush in and "fix" things. Sometimes, we are just meant to LOVE on people. Because God is the only one who can heal, fix, and SAVE!)
10. When you have weird feelings, sense a dark change, dont feel like yourself, or are experiencing seasons or times of (fill in the blank negative feeling), dont just chalk that up to (fill in the blank usual excuse, ie. period, hard day at work, kids driving you nuts, etc). Sometimes, those FEELINGS we get is because we are experiencing spiritual warfare! Satan attacks us ALL the time through our loved ones, families, etc, and when you chalk it up to "oh my husband is just being grumpy" pretty soon that "grumpiness" turns into violence, or an affair, or abandonement. Anything can get out of control when you dont work to fix it, and if we as Christians continue to walk through life like there isnt a devil who is trying to bring us down then he will always win! SPIRITUAL WARFARE IS SOOOO STINKING REAL!!!
11. Realize that you have the POWER of GOD, dwelling inside you. We as people have no power, but God inside of us has ALL of the power. With Him, we really can do ANYTHING. SO wrap your little brain around that piece of info and GO CHANGE THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (theres no excuses! Shoo! Go on!! Get outta here!)
Of course there is SOOOOO much more that I have learned this year, and maybe I can share a little more each time I write. These things are not just lines on a page to me, or words out of a mouth, or advice in a self help book....these are part of my program now. God has reprogrammed my heart, to stop believing in the poisenous lies it once believed, to now believing the TRUTH! And the TRUTH, my friend, will set you FREE!!
I feel SO blessed to have found my faith later in life. Not only do I have a kick-butt testimony (which rocks out some how good God is) but I also did not have a "mold" to break. So many people who grew up in church or had religion shoved down their throats as a kid has a hard time figuring it out on their own. What is their own beliefs versus their parents? Why have I done this for 30 years to find out it really means nothing to me? Why dont I do this more? etc etc....these are GREAT questions to be asking yourself!! Finding my true identity through Christ has been the most excellent journey I have ever gotten to embark upon! I hope you who are reading this feel the same way...and if you dont, maybe something is missing! Im just a young girl, trying to find her voice, but if there is anything I can do to help....me and Jesus are here. Ready to listen. Ready to love :)
In Him,
Meg
Saturday, January 8, 2011
The Princess Diaries
Funny how GOOD God is huh?
Tonight I was watching The Princess Diaries while having a "spa night" with my BF Anna. As we lay there, soaking our feet in minty mush (that makes them feel as soft as a baby's butt) and wrapping our necks in heated goodness, I was relaxing-taking in the pleasure of not having to BE, not having to DO, not having to THINK....just....relaxing. If you have never watched The Princess Diaries, it stars Anne Hathaway who plays Mia, a teenage girl who's royal grandmother (Julie Andrews) comes to town, telling Mia that she is in fact a princess, and heir to her own thrown in a far away country. As the story unfolds, we see a once nerdy and invisible teenager blossom into a young woman who is learning she has a voice. With every step she takes to decide whether or not she will in fact accept the responsibility of being a Princess, we watch as viewers knowing she was born to do so, and how it would be so disappointing if she turned down the job because it is not only a job, but her true identity.
I never thought a relaxing, and think-free spa night would turn into something so huge in my brain. However, getting past the cheesy lines, the teen drama, the mushy Dawsons-Creek-like tunes, I found myself getting teary eyed...following this young girls journey into discovering her TRUE self-a journey, I myself have been on this year.
With being a new Christian, the past year has held numerous stepping stones, coming of age rites, discoveries, seasons, feats, etc. The most important thing though that I have learned this year is HOW MUCH GOD LOVES ME! And knowing that little fact, has given me my identity. I am not Meagan Cremeens who won the hopping contest in Pre-School 1990. I am not Meagan Cremeens whose parents divorced in 3rd grade and whose mother left. I am not Meagan Cremeens who played Snow White in community theatre or who wrecked her car her senior year in highschool or who dyes her hair a new color every few months or whose father was killed in a car accident and the list goes on and on. Sure, those things all happened in my life, but they do not define who I am.
God tells me that I am a PRINCESS. Adopted into His family and heir to His kingdom. He tells me I am LOVED. He tells me He sent His own Son down to die a criminals death on a cross just so He could have a RELATIONSHIP with ME, because He loves me THAT much! He tells me He loves me not because of WHAT IVE DONE or WHAT I DO, but because of WHO I AM! He tells me that my sins are FORGIVEN because of what His son has done-to SAVE ME!
WOW? Really? All of that for me? I have always been told that people never understand God's unconditional love for us until they have children of their own, and maybe that is true. But I know that I am understanding it more and more with each passing day, because with every second that passes He is SHOWING me that! In times where you dont feel God as near, or you are impatiently waiting for some direction, PLEASE know that HE IS ALWAYS THERE! And He is cooking up something GREAT for you! Just be PATIENT, and live your life! Loving Him and Loving others-and before you know it, doors will open and you will have the most AMAZING oppertunities staring you in the face-shining with His Glory and His Goodness and His FAITHFULNESS!
At the end of the movie, Mia has a decision to make. Will she accept her role as Princess? Or will she continue to live as a normal teenager? So often, we as Christians understand the role that we were created to play, who we were CHOSEN to BE, our Identity through Christ, but we turn it down. Turn down the oppertunity, the job, all of it. I could not imagine, at this point in my life, turning away from my Lord and the life He has called me to live. If a year ago, when He entered my life and SAVED ME, I turned it down instead, I would forever know in my heart that something was missing. That I was not living up to what I was meant to do or who I was meant to be. I would forever feel the weight of turning away from my TRUE IDENTITY.
I, Meagan Cremeens, am a PRINCESS. As a woman, I am the Crown of Creation. The devil is after me, but my God SAVES. Life is hard, but my God is FAITHFUL.
So you have a choice. Will you accept your role as royalty, given to you by the Creator of Heaven and Earth and all the universes and all the stars and every flower and everything in between? Or will you choose....to turn away?
In Him,
Meg
Tonight I was watching The Princess Diaries while having a "spa night" with my BF Anna. As we lay there, soaking our feet in minty mush (that makes them feel as soft as a baby's butt) and wrapping our necks in heated goodness, I was relaxing-taking in the pleasure of not having to BE, not having to DO, not having to THINK....just....relaxing. If you have never watched The Princess Diaries, it stars Anne Hathaway who plays Mia, a teenage girl who's royal grandmother (Julie Andrews) comes to town, telling Mia that she is in fact a princess, and heir to her own thrown in a far away country. As the story unfolds, we see a once nerdy and invisible teenager blossom into a young woman who is learning she has a voice. With every step she takes to decide whether or not she will in fact accept the responsibility of being a Princess, we watch as viewers knowing she was born to do so, and how it would be so disappointing if she turned down the job because it is not only a job, but her true identity.
I never thought a relaxing, and think-free spa night would turn into something so huge in my brain. However, getting past the cheesy lines, the teen drama, the mushy Dawsons-Creek-like tunes, I found myself getting teary eyed...following this young girls journey into discovering her TRUE self-a journey, I myself have been on this year.
With being a new Christian, the past year has held numerous stepping stones, coming of age rites, discoveries, seasons, feats, etc. The most important thing though that I have learned this year is HOW MUCH GOD LOVES ME! And knowing that little fact, has given me my identity. I am not Meagan Cremeens who won the hopping contest in Pre-School 1990. I am not Meagan Cremeens whose parents divorced in 3rd grade and whose mother left. I am not Meagan Cremeens who played Snow White in community theatre or who wrecked her car her senior year in highschool or who dyes her hair a new color every few months or whose father was killed in a car accident and the list goes on and on. Sure, those things all happened in my life, but they do not define who I am.
God tells me that I am a PRINCESS. Adopted into His family and heir to His kingdom. He tells me I am LOVED. He tells me He sent His own Son down to die a criminals death on a cross just so He could have a RELATIONSHIP with ME, because He loves me THAT much! He tells me He loves me not because of WHAT IVE DONE or WHAT I DO, but because of WHO I AM! He tells me that my sins are FORGIVEN because of what His son has done-to SAVE ME!
WOW? Really? All of that for me? I have always been told that people never understand God's unconditional love for us until they have children of their own, and maybe that is true. But I know that I am understanding it more and more with each passing day, because with every second that passes He is SHOWING me that! In times where you dont feel God as near, or you are impatiently waiting for some direction, PLEASE know that HE IS ALWAYS THERE! And He is cooking up something GREAT for you! Just be PATIENT, and live your life! Loving Him and Loving others-and before you know it, doors will open and you will have the most AMAZING oppertunities staring you in the face-shining with His Glory and His Goodness and His FAITHFULNESS!
At the end of the movie, Mia has a decision to make. Will she accept her role as Princess? Or will she continue to live as a normal teenager? So often, we as Christians understand the role that we were created to play, who we were CHOSEN to BE, our Identity through Christ, but we turn it down. Turn down the oppertunity, the job, all of it. I could not imagine, at this point in my life, turning away from my Lord and the life He has called me to live. If a year ago, when He entered my life and SAVED ME, I turned it down instead, I would forever know in my heart that something was missing. That I was not living up to what I was meant to do or who I was meant to be. I would forever feel the weight of turning away from my TRUE IDENTITY.
I, Meagan Cremeens, am a PRINCESS. As a woman, I am the Crown of Creation. The devil is after me, but my God SAVES. Life is hard, but my God is FAITHFUL.
So you have a choice. Will you accept your role as royalty, given to you by the Creator of Heaven and Earth and all the universes and all the stars and every flower and everything in between? Or will you choose....to turn away?
In Him,
Meg
Thursday, January 6, 2011
You're the God of this City
There is no one like our God. Can I get an amen? :)
As I sit here in my room, unable to sleep again at 2am, I decided I should blog. Sometimes, with no reflection upon one's day, we so easily forget how God is at work in everything-things we do not even know and things we can not even see. But He is there, working, preparing, and being ever so faithful to the promises He has made to His children. Now that I reflect back on the day-WOW-has He done so much, even just in the past 24 hours of my life.
I recieved a text message today from a friend. She has recently decided to put Christ back in the center of her life and she is already doing some ROCKING things for the Kingdom. Like so many of us who have gained our faith later in life, she struggles sometimes with people assuming that she is the same person she used to be. When I first decided to follow Christ, and I mean truly surrender my life to His will, it was just a year ago. In the weeks that followed my decision (which is actuality felt nothing like a decision on my own part but instead being handpicked by God to recieve His Holy Spirit) I had to sacrifice many things, one of them being hanging out with friends. Now, I am not saying that you cant have friends who arent believers, and I am not at all saying that being Saved means ditching the people who surround you that need Jesus too. Hear me say that I made a personal decision to stop going to toxic places and surrounding myself with temptations that were only harder on my own walk with God. I was hanging out with a big bar hopping karaoke crowd at the time, and for me to continously turn down offers to go out or hang out with the group that had become like family to me for over a year, probably really confused and hurt them (and for that I am deeply sorry). But to make my point, some of those people as well as many others in my life chose not to see that I was a changed person and insisted on treating me like the same old Meg. The Meg who cussed like a sailor, the Meg who liked to drink, the Meg who was not filled with the Holy Spirit but filled with the brokenness and the anger of someone whom satan had been working on all her life. But I am not that girl anymore. Christ gives me my identity. Nobody else.
The text I recieved today was similar-a girl at work listening to her co-workers talking about affairs and things she in the past had laughed along with. But today, something inside her told her 'This isnt funny. These people are broken and need to be loved on. Are you the girl for the job? Or are you going to sit back and act like I never came into your life and rescued you?' WOW. (Talk about a Holy Spirit nudge right there!)
If you have ever been or are in a situation now where you find yourself getting defeated or frustrated at things in your past coming back to haunt you then just remember that it does NOT matter who people think you are because the Lord in Heaven KNOWS who you are. And your life should be a living testimony to His love for us by how you love on others. Satan loves to make us think that we are not worth it. That we can not be used for ministry because we used to lead jacked up lives. That we will never amount to anything because of decisions we once made. But do you know what? SATAN IS A LIAR!!
Simple as that. Dont listen to the voice in your head, listen to the voice in your heart. The heart that is the dwelling place for the LIVING GOD!
There are a few songs I want to share that relate to the topic of being remade one by tenth avenue north and the other by casting crowns.
"Remade"
You are more than the choices that youve made. You are more than the sum of your past mistakes. You are more than the problems you create. Youve been remade
"Who Am I"
Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt? Who am I? That the bright and morning star would choose to light the way for my ever wondering heart? Not because of who I am but because of what Youve done. Not because of what Ive done but because of who You are!"
The second thing that happened to me today was a situation with a friend, where God hit me over the head and reminded me that something I was doing was hurtful-completely unintentional, but hurtful nonetheless. As people who love God and follow His will in our lives I feel like it can become difficult in areas where you have to blur lines in order to help. In this particular situation I had a friend confess a hard situation she was going through and immediately wanted to share with another friend-not for gossip sake, but from one prayer warrior to another asking for help. But the friend who confided in me wouldnt have looked at it that way at all because she is not follower of the Lord. In that situation God very clearly told me to apologize to my friend and how I need to watch out for doing things that others did to me when I was not a Christian, things I hated then and now find myself doing to people who were like I was a year or more ago. Funny how God works huh?
The last incident today that really showed me how God is doing SO much more than we know or give Him credit for is the community prayer service held at my church tonight. Spiritual leaders from congregations and denominations all over NEA came to pray for families and marriages and soldiers and the world and churches and everything you could possibly think of. It was beautiful, hearing these men of God asking the Lord to show up in all of these places. I was particularly touched when things were mentioned about churches and spiritual leaders, and prayers were made that they be reminded to that God is in control and not them. So hard I pray that (not just spiritual leaders but) people as a whole could recognize that what we think is important sometimes is in fact, not that important in the grande scheme of things.
In my own life I weigh decisions with "In the grande scheme of things how important is worrying about this fill in the blank issue?" or "Is a new pair of shoes that would make like 50 plus that I own really that important when there are shoeless children all over the world who could use them more?"-that is just the way my brain processes things. So when I sit in church (and not just my own church but churches in general especially in this part of the world) I cant help but deviate from the sermon sometimes to notice the things that seem to be going unnoticed. In the grande scheme of things is a church remodel more important than using the money for more outreach in the community? Well, no not really-because "church" which is really just the body of christ, could be held in a tent for all I care ya now? Is making people feel comfortable while their butts are in the pews on Sunday mornings what is more important? Catoring to the crowd we already have? Well...I would say no, because we are not called to live "radically" we were DESIGNED to BE radical. Always.
The things of this world have so many Christians being lukewarm that sometimes I fear that we have forgotten what it is all about. And we all have moments of this, sure. There are no fingers being pointed here. I just feel like it is a nice reminder for us to put priorities in check and to figure out the things that really need to be DONE and SAID in order to recruit for the Kingdom and show Gods love to others. (Sorry, once Im on my church and religion soapbox it is HARD to get me off)
WRAPPING UP---it was an absolute PLEASURE and BLESSING to have the worship and prayer time with members of the community tonight. I feel like God IS doing something in this city, and if we all work together as one body stripped of denomination and prejudice or grudge or whatever, then we can TRULY Impact this world!
God is not only working in this city, but as you read this He is also doing AMAZING works in your life...works you may not even see for years to come. But they are happening. If you find yourself in a rut, or find yourself being hit over the head by God who is constantly teaching, or if you find yourself waiting for Him to reveal His plans for this city or for your life then stop a second. And REMEMBER that He is a FAITHFUL and GOOD God.
"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord "They are plans for peace and not disaster, plans to give you a future filled with HOPE"--Jeremiah 29:11
In Him
Meg
As I sit here in my room, unable to sleep again at 2am, I decided I should blog. Sometimes, with no reflection upon one's day, we so easily forget how God is at work in everything-things we do not even know and things we can not even see. But He is there, working, preparing, and being ever so faithful to the promises He has made to His children. Now that I reflect back on the day-WOW-has He done so much, even just in the past 24 hours of my life.
I recieved a text message today from a friend. She has recently decided to put Christ back in the center of her life and she is already doing some ROCKING things for the Kingdom. Like so many of us who have gained our faith later in life, she struggles sometimes with people assuming that she is the same person she used to be. When I first decided to follow Christ, and I mean truly surrender my life to His will, it was just a year ago. In the weeks that followed my decision (which is actuality felt nothing like a decision on my own part but instead being handpicked by God to recieve His Holy Spirit) I had to sacrifice many things, one of them being hanging out with friends. Now, I am not saying that you cant have friends who arent believers, and I am not at all saying that being Saved means ditching the people who surround you that need Jesus too. Hear me say that I made a personal decision to stop going to toxic places and surrounding myself with temptations that were only harder on my own walk with God. I was hanging out with a big bar hopping karaoke crowd at the time, and for me to continously turn down offers to go out or hang out with the group that had become like family to me for over a year, probably really confused and hurt them (and for that I am deeply sorry). But to make my point, some of those people as well as many others in my life chose not to see that I was a changed person and insisted on treating me like the same old Meg. The Meg who cussed like a sailor, the Meg who liked to drink, the Meg who was not filled with the Holy Spirit but filled with the brokenness and the anger of someone whom satan had been working on all her life. But I am not that girl anymore. Christ gives me my identity. Nobody else.
The text I recieved today was similar-a girl at work listening to her co-workers talking about affairs and things she in the past had laughed along with. But today, something inside her told her 'This isnt funny. These people are broken and need to be loved on. Are you the girl for the job? Or are you going to sit back and act like I never came into your life and rescued you?' WOW. (Talk about a Holy Spirit nudge right there!)
If you have ever been or are in a situation now where you find yourself getting defeated or frustrated at things in your past coming back to haunt you then just remember that it does NOT matter who people think you are because the Lord in Heaven KNOWS who you are. And your life should be a living testimony to His love for us by how you love on others. Satan loves to make us think that we are not worth it. That we can not be used for ministry because we used to lead jacked up lives. That we will never amount to anything because of decisions we once made. But do you know what? SATAN IS A LIAR!!
Simple as that. Dont listen to the voice in your head, listen to the voice in your heart. The heart that is the dwelling place for the LIVING GOD!
There are a few songs I want to share that relate to the topic of being remade one by tenth avenue north and the other by casting crowns.
"Remade"
You are more than the choices that youve made. You are more than the sum of your past mistakes. You are more than the problems you create. Youve been remade
"Who Am I"
Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt? Who am I? That the bright and morning star would choose to light the way for my ever wondering heart? Not because of who I am but because of what Youve done. Not because of what Ive done but because of who You are!"
The second thing that happened to me today was a situation with a friend, where God hit me over the head and reminded me that something I was doing was hurtful-completely unintentional, but hurtful nonetheless. As people who love God and follow His will in our lives I feel like it can become difficult in areas where you have to blur lines in order to help. In this particular situation I had a friend confess a hard situation she was going through and immediately wanted to share with another friend-not for gossip sake, but from one prayer warrior to another asking for help. But the friend who confided in me wouldnt have looked at it that way at all because she is not follower of the Lord. In that situation God very clearly told me to apologize to my friend and how I need to watch out for doing things that others did to me when I was not a Christian, things I hated then and now find myself doing to people who were like I was a year or more ago. Funny how God works huh?
The last incident today that really showed me how God is doing SO much more than we know or give Him credit for is the community prayer service held at my church tonight. Spiritual leaders from congregations and denominations all over NEA came to pray for families and marriages and soldiers and the world and churches and everything you could possibly think of. It was beautiful, hearing these men of God asking the Lord to show up in all of these places. I was particularly touched when things were mentioned about churches and spiritual leaders, and prayers were made that they be reminded to that God is in control and not them. So hard I pray that (not just spiritual leaders but) people as a whole could recognize that what we think is important sometimes is in fact, not that important in the grande scheme of things.
In my own life I weigh decisions with "In the grande scheme of things how important is worrying about this fill in the blank issue?" or "Is a new pair of shoes that would make like 50 plus that I own really that important when there are shoeless children all over the world who could use them more?"-that is just the way my brain processes things. So when I sit in church (and not just my own church but churches in general especially in this part of the world) I cant help but deviate from the sermon sometimes to notice the things that seem to be going unnoticed. In the grande scheme of things is a church remodel more important than using the money for more outreach in the community? Well, no not really-because "church" which is really just the body of christ, could be held in a tent for all I care ya now? Is making people feel comfortable while their butts are in the pews on Sunday mornings what is more important? Catoring to the crowd we already have? Well...I would say no, because we are not called to live "radically" we were DESIGNED to BE radical. Always.
The things of this world have so many Christians being lukewarm that sometimes I fear that we have forgotten what it is all about. And we all have moments of this, sure. There are no fingers being pointed here. I just feel like it is a nice reminder for us to put priorities in check and to figure out the things that really need to be DONE and SAID in order to recruit for the Kingdom and show Gods love to others. (Sorry, once Im on my church and religion soapbox it is HARD to get me off)
WRAPPING UP---it was an absolute PLEASURE and BLESSING to have the worship and prayer time with members of the community tonight. I feel like God IS doing something in this city, and if we all work together as one body stripped of denomination and prejudice or grudge or whatever, then we can TRULY Impact this world!
God is not only working in this city, but as you read this He is also doing AMAZING works in your life...works you may not even see for years to come. But they are happening. If you find yourself in a rut, or find yourself being hit over the head by God who is constantly teaching, or if you find yourself waiting for Him to reveal His plans for this city or for your life then stop a second. And REMEMBER that He is a FAITHFUL and GOOD God.
"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord "They are plans for peace and not disaster, plans to give you a future filled with HOPE"--Jeremiah 29:11
In Him
Meg
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Jesus....and Taylor Swift
I have not posted a blog since the summer, but yes-you guessed it-as part of my "new years resolution" to myself (which I refer to as my 2011 Bucket List) I am going to start blogging more. Which leads me into today's topic of Taylor Swift and Jesus Christ. How do these two figures have anything to do with each other what so ever? (Go with me on this)
I am going to admit it to the world. I am a Taylor Swift fan. Yes, I said it. I like Taylor Swift. (10 second pause for cracking jokes at me aaaaannnnnnddddd.......end scene) Taylor Swift is unique in that she is a young girl who has a voice. She has already tackeled two obstacles that people have been fighting to tackle for decades and continue to fight everyday, and that is 1. being female and 2. being young. I enjoy Taylor's writing (as cheesy as alot of it is) because she expresses herself so well. Her stuff may be juvenile, but that is because she is just a kid who deals everyday with things that teenagers have to deal with. Her latest album titled SpeaK NoW is a compilation of songs whose lyrics were written for someone specific. As Taylor usually does there are several about past boyfriends, some who broke her heart and some whom she broke theirs. There are songs to people who have been mean or hateful to her. There are songs about being enchanted by meeting someone new. Although I am not normally a fan at all of songs that ensenuate not being able to live without someone (because all people can be lived without, it is God that we need) I am still a fan of Taylor simply because she has been given a voice and is not afraid to use it.
So, you might be thining, how does this have anything to do with God? I had dinner last night with two amazing women of God, both who inspire me fully with every word that comes out of their mouth. We got onto the subject about living radically for the Lord, and how it isn't really radical at all because living that way is how we were created to live all along. We all go to different denominations, but none of us consider ourselves "baptist" or "church of christ" or whatever else. We are followers of God and lovers of Christ and trying to make the world a better place by spreading His word and His love to everyone we encounter. Given that we are all young and all female we have all been (or will be) faced with the challenges of finding and using our voices.
God has given all of us a voice. So often I find myself in a situation where for a split second I consider doing something or doing nothing. For example, have you ever passed a car that is broken down on the side of the road and for a split second as you drive you wonder, should I stop? Usually in cases where we have that decision to make, fear dictates our decision and we continue driving. Or for younger people, have you ever seen that kid at a lunch table or outside all alone and wanted to go up to them but were scared of what your friends might think or say? Fear wins, and we stay behind. Why do we as humans give fear so much power? An answer I have for myself is more times than not it is easier to just do nothing than to do something.
Imagine a world where satans attempts to manipulate us with fear failed. A world where when you saw a car broken down on the side of the road you stopped to help, or prayed for help, or called someone who could help. A world where kids do not feel alone on this planet because other kids step out of their fear and simply go sit with them at lunch. I have not read yet nor do I believe that we can control what satan attempts to do to us. But I 100% believe that we DON'T have to listen to him.
I do not know Taylor Swift personally, so I don't know if she is a Christian. But if she used her brilliant words and cunning lyrics to write about God's Love for us, about satan's tricks and staying clear of giving him power that isn't his to have, about being Saved by the blood of the Lamb, about a love and a rescue so great that it puts movies like the Notebook to shame, etc etc etc....then her VOICE that she has been given, will reach millions of people who before hearing about it, might not have known any of that.
We are all given a voice. We are tools for God to spread His Love and His Story. I feel that those nudges of " Should I stop and help that person?" "Should I go talk to that kid?" and SO many more split second thoughts of doing something or doing nothing, are HOLY SPIRIT NUDGES-guiding us to live outside of our fear, and to do SOMETHING. to say SOMETHING. or as Taylor would say, to SPEAK NOW!
Maybe your voice isnt talking. Maybe your voice is painting. Maybe it is writing. Maybe it is singing. Maybe it is playing an instrument, or coaching a team, or photography. God gives us talents so that we can use them to GLORIFY Him, but so often we get wrapped up in our gift and forget to give Him the praise. We have a voice in our gifts, so what would happen if we started using that voice?
If painters started painting in worship for the King. If photographers took pictures of Creation to share God's message. If football coaches brought the Gospel into team meetings instead of the playbook. If songwriters, like Taylor Swift, wrote songs about God's love.
What would happen if we decided to speak now?
In Him,
Meg
I am going to admit it to the world. I am a Taylor Swift fan. Yes, I said it. I like Taylor Swift. (10 second pause for cracking jokes at me aaaaannnnnnddddd.......end scene) Taylor Swift is unique in that she is a young girl who has a voice. She has already tackeled two obstacles that people have been fighting to tackle for decades and continue to fight everyday, and that is 1. being female and 2. being young. I enjoy Taylor's writing (as cheesy as alot of it is) because she expresses herself so well. Her stuff may be juvenile, but that is because she is just a kid who deals everyday with things that teenagers have to deal with. Her latest album titled SpeaK NoW is a compilation of songs whose lyrics were written for someone specific. As Taylor usually does there are several about past boyfriends, some who broke her heart and some whom she broke theirs. There are songs to people who have been mean or hateful to her. There are songs about being enchanted by meeting someone new. Although I am not normally a fan at all of songs that ensenuate not being able to live without someone (because all people can be lived without, it is God that we need) I am still a fan of Taylor simply because she has been given a voice and is not afraid to use it.
So, you might be thining, how does this have anything to do with God? I had dinner last night with two amazing women of God, both who inspire me fully with every word that comes out of their mouth. We got onto the subject about living radically for the Lord, and how it isn't really radical at all because living that way is how we were created to live all along. We all go to different denominations, but none of us consider ourselves "baptist" or "church of christ" or whatever else. We are followers of God and lovers of Christ and trying to make the world a better place by spreading His word and His love to everyone we encounter. Given that we are all young and all female we have all been (or will be) faced with the challenges of finding and using our voices.
God has given all of us a voice. So often I find myself in a situation where for a split second I consider doing something or doing nothing. For example, have you ever passed a car that is broken down on the side of the road and for a split second as you drive you wonder, should I stop? Usually in cases where we have that decision to make, fear dictates our decision and we continue driving. Or for younger people, have you ever seen that kid at a lunch table or outside all alone and wanted to go up to them but were scared of what your friends might think or say? Fear wins, and we stay behind. Why do we as humans give fear so much power? An answer I have for myself is more times than not it is easier to just do nothing than to do something.
Imagine a world where satans attempts to manipulate us with fear failed. A world where when you saw a car broken down on the side of the road you stopped to help, or prayed for help, or called someone who could help. A world where kids do not feel alone on this planet because other kids step out of their fear and simply go sit with them at lunch. I have not read yet nor do I believe that we can control what satan attempts to do to us. But I 100% believe that we DON'T have to listen to him.
I do not know Taylor Swift personally, so I don't know if she is a Christian. But if she used her brilliant words and cunning lyrics to write about God's Love for us, about satan's tricks and staying clear of giving him power that isn't his to have, about being Saved by the blood of the Lamb, about a love and a rescue so great that it puts movies like the Notebook to shame, etc etc etc....then her VOICE that she has been given, will reach millions of people who before hearing about it, might not have known any of that.
We are all given a voice. We are tools for God to spread His Love and His Story. I feel that those nudges of " Should I stop and help that person?" "Should I go talk to that kid?" and SO many more split second thoughts of doing something or doing nothing, are HOLY SPIRIT NUDGES-guiding us to live outside of our fear, and to do SOMETHING. to say SOMETHING. or as Taylor would say, to SPEAK NOW!
Maybe your voice isnt talking. Maybe your voice is painting. Maybe it is writing. Maybe it is singing. Maybe it is playing an instrument, or coaching a team, or photography. God gives us talents so that we can use them to GLORIFY Him, but so often we get wrapped up in our gift and forget to give Him the praise. We have a voice in our gifts, so what would happen if we started using that voice?
If painters started painting in worship for the King. If photographers took pictures of Creation to share God's message. If football coaches brought the Gospel into team meetings instead of the playbook. If songwriters, like Taylor Swift, wrote songs about God's love.
What would happen if we decided to speak now?
In Him,
Meg
Thursday, April 22, 2010
I'M STILL HERE!!!
I have not gone anywhere one follower in cyberland so DONT YOU FRET!!! :) I have simply been taking some time diving deeper into the Word and deeper into Crazy Love, trying to really make the most out of it and rise to the challenges I feel it is bringing into my life and into my faith.
Last blog I talked about being in Chapter 4 which I have finished now. Chapter 4 talks about Lukewarm Christians. This chapter is probably scarily relatable to many Christians (i.e. American church-goers). Since I am new in my faith having just been Saved a few months ago, I feel like I could read this chapter with the right amount of subjectivity and objectivity and I really feel like I got alot out of it. Becase the chapter had SOO much weight and information I am literally holding the book now and am just going to go through to parts I took notes on or underlined and talk about those (because CLEARLY they were important enough for me to break out the trusty green pen and mark in this wonderful piece of literature).
The first thing I underlined was God's "outrageous love" for us (it always makes my heart smile). Next it talks about how here in the United States people/churches try to draw in the biggest crowds, gauge success of the ministry by how many people come forward or answer the invitation. But Jesus questions the authenticity of record keeping like that. In the Bible it says that when Jesus would start to draw large crowds He would speak in parables so that those who werent genuinely listening to Him wouldn't get it. So often we think we "get it" and more often then not we dont, we are faking, or we are living the life of getting it but our hearts dont truly understand. The note I took from this was to LISTEN to God. He is constantly talking to us, telling us what He wants us to do, etc...and so often we let day to day activities get in the way of listening to Him. Then we blame Him for leaving us! I saw a billboard the other day that said "If you do not feel as close to me, who do you think moved?" or something along those lines-basically that God is always there for His children, and if you feel He isnt then its YOU that has strayed, not Him. Chan goes on to write that "Jesus is not interested in those who FAKE it"
Another point Chan states later so many of us feel "godly" especially when we compare our faith to other people. You say well Im not as good as ole Betty but Im definitely not as bad as Tom so Im good to go. People try to fit the mold of the majority (and this is aimed at the majority of other fellow church-goers) and find it hard to truly live scripturely. The best option here is to DO WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS. No matter what your church preaches, how the people in your church act, etc...The Bible, God's WORD to us is the ONLY Truth. And sometimes the "majority" can be misleading. Chan goes on to talk about "radicals" and this struck my as interesting because when I started blogging I stated how I wanted to be radical for Christ. The thing is, Jesus calls EVERYONE to be RADICAL-because the term RADICAL is simply His expectation of us already. Just SOOO many Christians arent living that way, that it is easy to divide the church-goers and the radicals. Church-goers (church every sunday, dont swear, dont drink, just darn good people) being viewed as just your "normal" Christians. Radicalists being viewed as those who go "overboard" or are "extreme" for God...but doesnt God WANT us to be "extreme" for Him?? ALL of us?
The book then gets into the characteristics of a Lukewarm Christian. Because there are so many I am going to just briefly state them and if you who are reading this disagree or have questions I strongly challenge you to do several things a.get the book and read it, b. strike up a discussion about this exact thing with a Bible group or a group of friends or anyone, c. open your Bible and read for yourself what God says about being Lukewarm (I promise you, it's in there ALOT). and d. PRAY...If you feel your faith or Christian life is Lukewarm or not as strong as you thought, or you had been lead to believe your whole life that this is how to do it then PRAY and ask God to break your heart and truly show you what it is like to be in LOVE with Him!!
Here it goes (Don't shoot the messenger)...
1. Lukewarm people attend church fairly regularly because they feel that is what is expected of them.
2.Lukewarm people give money to church and charity as long as it stretch their financial way of living.
3. Lukewarm people tend to choose what is popular over what is right when faced with conflict
4. Lukewarm people dont really want to be saved from their sin, only from the PENALTY of their sin.
5.Lukewarm people are moved by stories about "radical" Christians but never act on it themselves.
6.Lukewarm people rarely shair their faith with their neighbors, family, co-workers, etc.
7.Lukwarm people gauge their "goodness" by comparing themselves to the secular world.
8. Lukewarm people have Jesus as a PART of their lives...(ooh yea think on that one)
9. Lukewarm people Love God, but they dont love Him HEART, SOUL, and STRENGTH (fully devoted to Him)
10. Lukewarm people love others, but not as much as they love themselves.
11. Lukewarm people put limits on how much the love others by limiting time, energy, money, etc
12. Lukewarm people think about life on eath much more than about where they spend eternity (um guilty for sure...OUCH)
13. Lukewarm people escape guilt by doing the bare minimum of goodness to get by
14.Lukewarm people PLAY IT SAFE...pray to the god of control (ouch again...yeah, when you dont relinquish control you are basically saying you dont think God is really big enough to handle your measly little human problems)
Wow....hard to read huh? Even harder when you read in depth what Chan means by each Lukewarm Person statement...and then the SCRIPTURE that backs it up. So, needless to say my absence from blogging is due to a number of things, one of which was getting through the chapter. There is a chapter in Revelation about God spitting the Lukewarm out of his mouth. I dont want to be spit out of my Saviors mouth, not when He is my one chance of spending eternity with my God...ya know?
I actually started chapter 5 in Crazy Love, but before I could finish it has issued a challenge of re-reading (or reading for the first time) the Gospels. And not as how we know them, how we've heard them, but truly with new eyes as if you were reading them for the first time. Or if you were a child trying to understand what it is saying. So that is where I am at now...I started with John because I was already in John in my individual nightly Bible study.
I have had a rockin week of worship and fellowship and God is TRULY doing some amazing things in my life right now. Have a blessed week
Meg
Last blog I talked about being in Chapter 4 which I have finished now. Chapter 4 talks about Lukewarm Christians. This chapter is probably scarily relatable to many Christians (i.e. American church-goers). Since I am new in my faith having just been Saved a few months ago, I feel like I could read this chapter with the right amount of subjectivity and objectivity and I really feel like I got alot out of it. Becase the chapter had SOO much weight and information I am literally holding the book now and am just going to go through to parts I took notes on or underlined and talk about those (because CLEARLY they were important enough for me to break out the trusty green pen and mark in this wonderful piece of literature).
The first thing I underlined was God's "outrageous love" for us (it always makes my heart smile). Next it talks about how here in the United States people/churches try to draw in the biggest crowds, gauge success of the ministry by how many people come forward or answer the invitation. But Jesus questions the authenticity of record keeping like that. In the Bible it says that when Jesus would start to draw large crowds He would speak in parables so that those who werent genuinely listening to Him wouldn't get it. So often we think we "get it" and more often then not we dont, we are faking, or we are living the life of getting it but our hearts dont truly understand. The note I took from this was to LISTEN to God. He is constantly talking to us, telling us what He wants us to do, etc...and so often we let day to day activities get in the way of listening to Him. Then we blame Him for leaving us! I saw a billboard the other day that said "If you do not feel as close to me, who do you think moved?" or something along those lines-basically that God is always there for His children, and if you feel He isnt then its YOU that has strayed, not Him. Chan goes on to write that "Jesus is not interested in those who FAKE it"
Another point Chan states later so many of us feel "godly" especially when we compare our faith to other people. You say well Im not as good as ole Betty but Im definitely not as bad as Tom so Im good to go. People try to fit the mold of the majority (and this is aimed at the majority of other fellow church-goers) and find it hard to truly live scripturely. The best option here is to DO WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS. No matter what your church preaches, how the people in your church act, etc...The Bible, God's WORD to us is the ONLY Truth. And sometimes the "majority" can be misleading. Chan goes on to talk about "radicals" and this struck my as interesting because when I started blogging I stated how I wanted to be radical for Christ. The thing is, Jesus calls EVERYONE to be RADICAL-because the term RADICAL is simply His expectation of us already. Just SOOO many Christians arent living that way, that it is easy to divide the church-goers and the radicals. Church-goers (church every sunday, dont swear, dont drink, just darn good people) being viewed as just your "normal" Christians. Radicalists being viewed as those who go "overboard" or are "extreme" for God...but doesnt God WANT us to be "extreme" for Him?? ALL of us?
The book then gets into the characteristics of a Lukewarm Christian. Because there are so many I am going to just briefly state them and if you who are reading this disagree or have questions I strongly challenge you to do several things a.get the book and read it, b. strike up a discussion about this exact thing with a Bible group or a group of friends or anyone, c. open your Bible and read for yourself what God says about being Lukewarm (I promise you, it's in there ALOT). and d. PRAY...If you feel your faith or Christian life is Lukewarm or not as strong as you thought, or you had been lead to believe your whole life that this is how to do it then PRAY and ask God to break your heart and truly show you what it is like to be in LOVE with Him!!
Here it goes (Don't shoot the messenger)...
1. Lukewarm people attend church fairly regularly because they feel that is what is expected of them.
2.Lukewarm people give money to church and charity as long as it stretch their financial way of living.
3. Lukewarm people tend to choose what is popular over what is right when faced with conflict
4. Lukewarm people dont really want to be saved from their sin, only from the PENALTY of their sin.
5.Lukewarm people are moved by stories about "radical" Christians but never act on it themselves.
6.Lukewarm people rarely shair their faith with their neighbors, family, co-workers, etc.
7.Lukwarm people gauge their "goodness" by comparing themselves to the secular world.
8. Lukewarm people have Jesus as a PART of their lives...(ooh yea think on that one)
9. Lukewarm people Love God, but they dont love Him HEART, SOUL, and STRENGTH (fully devoted to Him)
10. Lukewarm people love others, but not as much as they love themselves.
11. Lukewarm people put limits on how much the love others by limiting time, energy, money, etc
12. Lukewarm people think about life on eath much more than about where they spend eternity (um guilty for sure...OUCH)
13. Lukewarm people escape guilt by doing the bare minimum of goodness to get by
14.Lukewarm people PLAY IT SAFE...pray to the god of control (ouch again...yeah, when you dont relinquish control you are basically saying you dont think God is really big enough to handle your measly little human problems)
Wow....hard to read huh? Even harder when you read in depth what Chan means by each Lukewarm Person statement...and then the SCRIPTURE that backs it up. So, needless to say my absence from blogging is due to a number of things, one of which was getting through the chapter. There is a chapter in Revelation about God spitting the Lukewarm out of his mouth. I dont want to be spit out of my Saviors mouth, not when He is my one chance of spending eternity with my God...ya know?
I actually started chapter 5 in Crazy Love, but before I could finish it has issued a challenge of re-reading (or reading for the first time) the Gospels. And not as how we know them, how we've heard them, but truly with new eyes as if you were reading them for the first time. Or if you were a child trying to understand what it is saying. So that is where I am at now...I started with John because I was already in John in my individual nightly Bible study.
I have had a rockin week of worship and fellowship and God is TRULY doing some amazing things in my life right now. Have a blessed week
Meg
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Can you paint with all the colors of the Wind??
The title of this blog reflects the love I have in my heart for Disney's Pocahontas. (and that's all I have to say about that)
I quickly wanted to reflect on some things on my heart. (Quickly because it is 1am and the later it gets the sleepier I become, the sleepier I become the blurrier these thoughts are)
In chapter 4 of Crazy Love (still rocking my world). It is talking about Lukewarm Christians, and it is so true and so challenging to read because with each line I find myself wanting to stop reading and go out and immediately change. But I know alof of that change and transformation will come with equipping myself spiritually to handle it (arming myself with scripture for example). So I am going to finish chapter 4 before I offically blog about it, just letting you (you being the 2 people who may or may not be reading this) that I am still in the book, just trying to take it through each challenge.
I have had the amazing honor of introducing several new Christian women into my life whom I love so much already. They are rockin' girls, with an immense love for Christ, and really do live what they believe and are an example and light to me as I am new in my faith, and new in this journey. God ROCKS for bringing them into my life at this perfect moment Ive needed a group like that to plug into.
I went to a couple of worship and fellowship oppertunities this week and theyve also rocked my world. Last night we talked sort of about giving up everything to and for God, truly sacrificing what you know you should sacrifice in order to seek a truthful relationship with Him. Which is such a great lesson to learn because everyone has weight in their life and when that weight is let go you can totally fall into the arms of Christ and there truly is no safer place to land then in the arms of our Creator, right?!
Todays lesson on campus was about finding out how to choose your partner (the M word!! BOM BOM BOMMMMMMMMM) :) It was an AMAZING lesson (one i looked forward to all week mind you) because I feel it is something very practical we all need to know, and not just biblically but functionally as well.
Following worship there I had the oppertunity of meeting a great friend for coffee who has also been spirtually mentoring me the past couple of weeks and we TOO talked about relationships and marriage and functionally combined with biblically what are good traits of a husband in general and then specifically for me. Not that I am looking for a husband by any means, I am not even looking right now for someone to date. But having that sort of in the back of my mind will always be a good card to pull out when temptation arises I will have what I want this future person in my life to look like, if the guy isnt it then he wont make the cut.
I listened to an awesome lesson (sort of) by Bethany Dillon last night who is a Christian singer/songwriter and it just so happened to be about married life and how married life truly makes you divided in your time and energy to God. She wrote a song about it called "Say Your Name" if youre interested, BEAUTIFUL song. (see? God TRULY ties things in for us to get the bigger picture sometimes)
I say all of that to say this...This blog was not strictly about a challenge, or about the next chapter in crazy love...it was about gathering my thoughts about the week. The time with my new group of girlfriends, and my trusty old friend, and time at worship wednesday and thursday, time in class even (watching a movie 21 grams), and just time alone in my car singing worship music, or talking to God at my grandmothers grave site...this week has been FULL of oppertunity to Love God and to SERVE Him and to Tell about the AMAZINGNESS His grace, love and mercy bring to my life...and what I have come to realize is that I can STILL do more...I am thirsty for an intimate relationship with God, and my life has GOT to make some drastic changes or in 5 years when the time has simply slipped away from me, Ill look back and be only a lukewarm christian.....
Meg
I quickly wanted to reflect on some things on my heart. (Quickly because it is 1am and the later it gets the sleepier I become, the sleepier I become the blurrier these thoughts are)
In chapter 4 of Crazy Love (still rocking my world). It is talking about Lukewarm Christians, and it is so true and so challenging to read because with each line I find myself wanting to stop reading and go out and immediately change. But I know alof of that change and transformation will come with equipping myself spiritually to handle it (arming myself with scripture for example). So I am going to finish chapter 4 before I offically blog about it, just letting you (you being the 2 people who may or may not be reading this) that I am still in the book, just trying to take it through each challenge.
I have had the amazing honor of introducing several new Christian women into my life whom I love so much already. They are rockin' girls, with an immense love for Christ, and really do live what they believe and are an example and light to me as I am new in my faith, and new in this journey. God ROCKS for bringing them into my life at this perfect moment Ive needed a group like that to plug into.
I went to a couple of worship and fellowship oppertunities this week and theyve also rocked my world. Last night we talked sort of about giving up everything to and for God, truly sacrificing what you know you should sacrifice in order to seek a truthful relationship with Him. Which is such a great lesson to learn because everyone has weight in their life and when that weight is let go you can totally fall into the arms of Christ and there truly is no safer place to land then in the arms of our Creator, right?!
Todays lesson on campus was about finding out how to choose your partner (the M word!! BOM BOM BOMMMMMMMMM) :) It was an AMAZING lesson (one i looked forward to all week mind you) because I feel it is something very practical we all need to know, and not just biblically but functionally as well.
Following worship there I had the oppertunity of meeting a great friend for coffee who has also been spirtually mentoring me the past couple of weeks and we TOO talked about relationships and marriage and functionally combined with biblically what are good traits of a husband in general and then specifically for me. Not that I am looking for a husband by any means, I am not even looking right now for someone to date. But having that sort of in the back of my mind will always be a good card to pull out when temptation arises I will have what I want this future person in my life to look like, if the guy isnt it then he wont make the cut.
I listened to an awesome lesson (sort of) by Bethany Dillon last night who is a Christian singer/songwriter and it just so happened to be about married life and how married life truly makes you divided in your time and energy to God. She wrote a song about it called "Say Your Name" if youre interested, BEAUTIFUL song. (see? God TRULY ties things in for us to get the bigger picture sometimes)
I say all of that to say this...This blog was not strictly about a challenge, or about the next chapter in crazy love...it was about gathering my thoughts about the week. The time with my new group of girlfriends, and my trusty old friend, and time at worship wednesday and thursday, time in class even (watching a movie 21 grams), and just time alone in my car singing worship music, or talking to God at my grandmothers grave site...this week has been FULL of oppertunity to Love God and to SERVE Him and to Tell about the AMAZINGNESS His grace, love and mercy bring to my life...and what I have come to realize is that I can STILL do more...I am thirsty for an intimate relationship with God, and my life has GOT to make some drastic changes or in 5 years when the time has simply slipped away from me, Ill look back and be only a lukewarm christian.....
Meg
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